Monday, May 09, 2005

One for MilkyNZ's mum ; Saturdays in England ; Rugby, neddies, streaking, curry and pole-dancing.

On Saturday we went here...


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...to watch the guys on the left play the ones on the right
(Navy v Army)


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The faithful


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We figured he didn't know about this sticker, it seemed a shame to tell him.


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Once at the ground, I met up with this lot :

(l-r) Darren, Laura, Tom, Milk Yuk, Andy, Kirsty, Tony, Paul.


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Tony went off to sell our 2 spare tickets (yes - still wearing those shades) & came back with this incontravertible piece of logic 'I didn't sell them on cos the guy buying was only offering me a tenner for each ticket' That's right Tone, far better to get no money for them at all.

I took this, by mistake...


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...whilst trying for this, but quite liked it
anyway


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These are the only fish & chips worth eating in the South of England, because
... all together now 'all the others smell of wee'


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After a very stirring opening from a Dukie band the game got under way & as ever, there was much hearty banter in the crowd. This is something I love about rugby games, no segregation & no bother, because all the blood-letting is occurring on the pitch. Proper men too, no rolling around when injured (football) & no padding (American football)

The outcome was as you would expect in that the Army drubbed the Navy. As someone from work pointed out 'Where do the Navy practice and do they need lots of rugby balls ?'I think the final score was 42-15 although my zoom wasn't sufficiently powerful to give me a shot of the scoreboard.

In fairness to the Navy, the game was initially pretty equal, & this was reflected in the tied halftime scoreline (8 I think) and so the Blues supporters in front of us were in good cheer. Which just made it all the more enjoyable when they capitulated so thoroughly in the second half.

After the game we met up with Hx, MilkyNZ & the MTM's & headed off in search of a hostelry.

There was much muttering from

this man


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about it 'being a sh1t plan' but he happily tagged along anyway.

In the pub Hx took a shine to this lamp & had to be disuaded several times from removing it.

'I see a tall dark uniformed man ... he will be arresting me under the Theft Act 1968'


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And here were 2 lovely photos of Hx & MilkyNZ but you'll have to take my word for it cos PhotoBucket has eated them all up :(

After refreshment we headed off for the curry house and Part 1 of the evning. The MTM's wisely took their leave at this point. They didn't know at the time their decision was wise. But it was ;) Laura had played a blinder booking the restaurant ; we all got onto the same table, the food was lovely & the service prompt. The huge queue outside as we ate testified to it's popularity and once sated we headed off for more refreshment.

It is at this point that I should probably re-introduce Dom(inic).You may remember Dom from the Christmas do as being the one who went to The Queens Hotel, as the rest of us did ... but in Gatwick, whereas we were in Brighton. Dom is legendary for failing to turn up to our nights out, not because he doesn't make the effort but because he usually essays his outgoing journey after alcohol. A couple of weeks ago, we met in Kingston (Surrey) and received a text from Dom an hour after the agreed start time asking where we were. He was in Portsmouth (Hampshire)

For the Kiwis, this is the equivalent of agreeing to meet in Auckland & finding yourself in Hamilton.

This is Dom


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He looks lovely doesn't he ? And he is. Then he has a drink and ... he's still lovely but he turns into this hyper, good-natured, extremely generous, whirling dervish who doesn't know when to quit. Dom has to give up his wallet to a growed-up at the beginning of a night out. If he doesn't he is likely to buy 'champagne all round' and I mean the whole pub.

He also gets very friendly after a few ...


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The combination of Dom & Hx was quite a formidable one.

Especially when Hx decided to teach Dom to pole dance.

Dom hopes to make Commissioner one day, we call the following shots his 'career-enders'.

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To understand how amusing this was, you have to know that NO-ONE else in these pictures is dancing. Or even moving much.

Hx was suitably impressed with Dom's dancing


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Once Hx had finished with Dom, she went on to teach Darren & Paul how to pole dance. You have to know how reserved Darren is to understand how unlikely this photo is.

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For many months now I have been hoping someone would outdo my antics at my Christmas do, thus shifting the spotlight. Hx proved what a great buddy she is by claiming the mantle on Saturday. Not content with pole dancing & balancing pints in her cleavage she also 'had a word' with the biggest, drunkest bloke who was intent on displaying his wares. To round things off she told everyone (Milk Yuk) at sporadic intervals that they were 'GAAAAAAWJUS' !!

At the point where we ran out of money/couldn't drink any more/needed to sit down (delete as applicable) we headed off home. I found myself on Twickenham bridge with these three.

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After several cabs ignored us Dom decided the best ploy was to flash some ankle. Oddly the cabs continued to speed by. His next plan was to pretend to be dead as a paramedic ambulance passed us. After a cursory glance they ignored their Hippocratic duties and at last we admitted defeat & got on a bus.

Dom got off the bus in Kingston claiming he needed an ATM. Wonder if he ever made it home ?

Have any of you have made it this far & are wondering about the streaker in the title ? Thankfully it was none of our mob but a very cheerful chap who took to the field wearing nothing but a large affro wig.

For all round entertainment though, there were 2 clear-cut winners ...

(Wo)man of the match ; Hx & Dom

Cx

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