Today I 'ave been mostly burning things.

The paddocks which lucerne was grown in last season had to have
the tops burned off. Mal knows by now not to ask if I want to help if
it involves burning.

It was very gusty and our matches kept blowing out before we could get the flame
to touch the dead, highly flammable grass.

'We would make lousy arsonists' he said laughing 'the fire brigade would be here
before we could get a decent blaze going'

I met an old friend today.

The ewes with lambs were being treated for parasites & I looked at one lamb in particular
& noticed he only had half a tail.

Eric.

He is thriving & Mum is very protective now which is as it should be so I was only
allowed a quick cuddle before she got too anxious.

He showed no signs of recognising me, ungrateful little bleeder :)

On Tuesday I crutched my 1st sheep.

Don't worry - it's legal.

'Crutching' is the term for removing certain bits of a ewe's fleece usually prior to lambing.
It is done to assist the lamb finding the udder & also to try & keep the ewe's rear end
slightly cleaner so the afterbirth drops away properly.

At the other end, the hair is removed from around the sheep's eyes to prevent
'wool-blindness' This is when the animals vision is badly impaired by too much wool. They can lose condition quickly by not being able to see the grass.

This is what I am doing in this pic, although it looks like I am threatening to remove the ewe's eye if she does not co-operate. Look - no fingernails.



Here is my mentor Mike, I didn't realise until I enlarged this that it looks as though the sun really does shine out of his a***



I have to say, using the handpiece (clippers to us) on a live animal is one of the most nerve-wracking things I have ever done. The blades are attached to an 8bhp motor & they make an amazing racket as well as leaping around if you try to hold them too tightly. The teeth would not look out of place in a dungeon.

It didn't help that Mike said, 'Keep them horizontal to the sheep or you can open it's guts up' either.

Watching him skim quicky round the sheep made it look so easy, in reality my sheep seemed to consist entirely of loose, pink, flappy, easily cut-offable bits. He said that it's a fact that women shearers are much more comfortable shearing rams than ewes.

Hmmm.

My worst fear came true when I tackled my 2nd ewe & was shearing it's head.

'Be firm with the clippers, you can't cut it's eye'

'Honestly, from this angle, you won't cut it's eye'

'Yes - I am definitely sure'

'Oh ... don't worry it's just a nick'

Needless to say the 'nick' gushed blood & I kept apologising.

'Please don't worry' said Mike.

'I'm apologising to the sheep, not you' I replied.

Oops. I felt terrible despite Mike's assurances that it was nothing major.

As we carried on with the others I kept looking outside at my sheep who looked like
she had been in a pub-fight.

Mike asked what I was looking for & I told him I was waiting to see if she filled in the visitors book.

"Warm welcome, friendly staff, tasty food, eye gouged out"

I thought I had got the hang of how Mike caught the sheep & laid them out prior to shearing so, wanting to show willing I asked him if I could 'nail' the next one.

He came in to help me & I shooed him away telling him I wanted to do it alone.

I picked the biggest ewe I could see (I'm from Yorkshire, it's genetic, I can't help it) & went to tackle her. Watching Mike I noted that he had grabbed the nose in his left hand, grabbed a handful of rump-wool in his right & stuck his knee in the sheep's ribs. He then twisted the sheep's head around to it's right, walked it backwards, pressed on it's bottom, over-balanced it & dragged it on it's back by it's forelegs to the shearing area.

Easy.

Wrong.

My sheep called my bluff. As I grabbed it's nose it exhaled snot all over my hand. Not to be deterred by such a trifling matter I grabbed it's back-end & stuck my knee in it's ribs. It promptly showered me with urine & defecated violently. Still keen, I tried to bend it's head backwards to unbalance it. The sheep charged around the pen twice,legs flailing, coating me in it's bodily contents much to Mike's amusement.

'Any chance of a hand ?'

He stopped sniggering for long enough to say

'No, no, you wanted to do this all on your own'

I eventually let go & decided to pick a smaller ewe.

'You shouldn't have done that' came the comment

'The other one will be twice as bad when you go back to her'





On Tuesday I normally take Genevieve to visit her Gran's while the older ones go to a tutors, yes, the dreaded Kip McGrath run. This week I asked Genevieve what she would like to do instead & told her she could choose to do absolutely anything & we would go & do it.

'Really ?' she asked, 'absolutely anything ?'

'Can we pleeeease go to the library ?'

So, off we went.

I had a lovely time. We sat in the kids section & I read all the Mick Inkpen books I could lay my hands on. Check them out if you are ever in a book-shop, he does the most beautiful water-colour illustrations. 'Wibbly Pig can draw' is my own personal favourite.

After that we looked at the grown-up books & I bored Gen rigid with books on Yorkshire. It is the 1st time I have been truly home-sick. I poured over the books looking for familiar places, Kilnsey Crag, Gordale Scar, Malham Cove, Ribblehead Viaduct, & my favourite Linton Falls.

It's like having a painfully wobbly tooth isn't it ?

You know it's going to hurt when you nudge it with your tongue but you just have to do it anyway.

Out of character moment warning approaching.

On the way back to the van Gen took my hand & said, out of nowhere

'You're the best nanny I've had'

I'm not daft, I know she has probably said that, in the way that kids do to every nanny, but it didn't stop me feeling a heel. Soft-focus moment was soon over though in the shop we went in. At the counter was a 'Free soft toy' wth every jar of multi-vitamins purchased.

Gen couldn't read the bit about the vitamins & probably didn't care but she did what every self-respecting kid would when faced with a sign saying 'Free toy' & helped herself.
I had to distract her by saying 'Last one to the van walks home'

The other warm, fuzzy, lump in throat moment was yesterday.

Every farmer has a pocket knife.

It's uses are numerous, from cutting baling twine to cleaning finger-nails to dislodging blind people from tractor tyres. I don't have a knife & always look with longing at Mal's & Mike's while I bend another kitchen knife.

Yesterday, Mal casually gave me his saying he '.... had another somewhere'



'Mal with his dog - Jude & Chum' Sepia - impressed ?

It even has a ickle button you have to depress before the blade retracts. Wow.

And just for good measure a moody black & white shot too.



On Sunday I drove up the Wairau valley as far as Nelson Lake.

I took this, not for the scenery, which is special enough, but because I hope you can see the clarity of the water. It was a metre deep but so clear it was as if it was invisible. I hope it is reproduced clearly enough on the pooter for you to see ?



And lastly (yes Mum I know the rule about and but I am tired & getting lazy)

An aah moment to say goodnight.



Titled "Mum ?"

Some thank-you's & hello's.

Di - Roses story. Predictable - yes. Made me cry - yes. Thank you.
Please could I have some pics of garden & window boxes ?
42 weeks.

Ang - Cats in hats. Fantastic, love the way they look so hacked off, especially lamb-cat.
Hope your week has improved ? E-mail all as soon as you have a mo.

Chef - Penguin. Took ages to down-load, worth the wait.
Re; daughter's boyfriend, just remember, approve of him heartily & she'll
go off him. Anyway, it's not grey, it's silver & it's distinguished.

Trudes - Card arrived, suitable replacement for Eric & needs less maintenance. Thank you.
Won any more shooting trophies this week ? Assume it was your lot in the 21
dawn raids for Adam so you must have been VERY busy. Hope you got the sexist
pigs to do the exhibits for once ?

Turbo - Letter & clippings arrived. It's not true, didn't you notice the author was male ?
If it was me being asked (& it isn't) I would have thought he was still too young.
(For the kids & that job)

Weeny - I had heard murmurings b4 leaving but it hadn't been confirmed. If you can contact
LX & VK to instigate the paperwork I will buy you a drink from the proceeds.
I owe you one of those vile, greeny/brown minty things.
What's black & brown & looks good on a solicitor ? - a dobermann.

Stu - 88 ? I hope your Dad demanded a urine test ?
Any more from Bodgit & Scarper aka Shoosmiths.
Looking forward to seeing the shed, bet LH garden looks beautiful ?

Cocky - Lovely to chat even if I hogged the conversation & you couldn't get a word in
edgeways for once.

Bill - The mountain looks less steep today.
Any more 'When dumb cops go bad scariest chases' moments ?

Lovely Col - E-mail arrived thanks. Ken choosing to go to Lambeth ? Are you sure ?
Will reply soonest.

Creaky - Thank you poppet. You are right, Bismarck is worse.

Martin - 18 of you ? I cannot even begin to imagine how outrageous you will be.
Can I reserve a Samoyed puppy ? Will reply soon.

Q - Will mail you tomorrow, need my bed now. Fine though.

Goodnight UK, great news about Tony Martin - bout bleedin' time.

Cx

"Self-opinionated old hag"

"Tell her to clean the f****** floor herself the lazy bint"

"Us HUMANS like you"

"Devils minions"

"Outraged"

"Psychic ? Psycho-reading more like"

The above comments are some of my favourites from the last couple of days e-mail.

The advice has ranged from the mature & sensible ...

"Keep your head high & don't lower yourself"

to the entertaining ...

"Roll up the job description & stick it ..." well, I'll let you work out the rest.

to the downright violent ...

"Let me at her"

It's why you lot are such a great bunch of mates & why I haven't felt
isolated during this week.

Best of all comes an offer of salvation from The Shire.

I may well be visiting depending how long Geoff takes in getting back to me.

Must dash

have some very interesting numbers of trains to write in my notebook

;-)

Cx

Afternoon,

If only every day were like Saturday.

Peace & quiet until 14.30

Got up at 0800, leisurely breakfast, took dogs out.

Waited for call from Cocky, gave up, went out, got a message to
say she rang straight after I went out.

Helped Mike feeding cattle, most of them went away to the works
on Thursday so it's the most stripped I have seen the farm since I got here.

Oddly enough, haven't fancied playing 'Happy Families' so have spent the
afternoon ensconced on the pooter as you will all find out when you
see your in-boxes.

In an hour I leave for Mal's & some pleasant company.

Tonight is a big-deal to the rugby-loving Kiwis.

The Bledisloe Cup is a game between NZ & Aus.

It has a history of fierce rivalry & bad blood.

Bit like the Calcutta Cup.

NZ were expecting to win it as they have just handsomely stuffed
the Springboks which felt good to them after being drubbed at the
hands of the Old Country.

The Kiwis netball team has also just had a surprise win against
Australia in the World Cup. Trish took great pleasure in telling me the
Kiwis had thrashed England on the way to the final.

I resisted the urge to tell her that about 2.3% of the world's population
gives a toss about netball.

Then the Ozzies beat NZ emphatically in league last night.

Different code I know but it sets up tonight as a nail-biter.

Speaking of which, I have bitten all mine.

I last bit them when I was 21.

That's easily 5 years ago :-)

Cx

Hello there,

Goodness, being a parent is tough.

I was up at 1, 3 & 5am feeding.

Don't do it Justine.

V.cute tho to hear a blah-lamb's ickle feet going tippy-tap on a wooden floor.

We put him back with Mum this morning to see if she was any more interested.

As a tired onlooker I was relieved so see he got stuck into his tucker.



I like to think he is saying 'Thank You' in this one



This afternoon we lit a huge household rubbish fire.

Reminded me of that day we told each other fire stories
at work Q & laughed til we wept.

"Fire, Fire"

Police in Auckland are hunting a serial arsonist after 14 fires in 1 night
last week.

Think I should forwards this chap's description ?



It was a beauty.

"Fire is good - it is our frieeeend"



I know it's really hot in England but just look at this blue sky.

Cue ELO



Chum is shaping up to be a feisty lad.

He fought Boy for his biscuits today & won.

And has all the makings of what they call here a really good 'eye dog'
This means a dog who can work stock just by staring at them to control them.
The other type is a 'huntaway', essentially a dog which makes a lot of
noise to drive stock ahead of them.

Here he is mesmerising a couple of lambs, note the raised forepaw, he means business.



Time for bed for me, could do with a good kip after last night.

Take care.

Cx

I am in love.



Eric - Named after MR T of Matamata

His name is Eric.

He is 1 day old.

I am his Mummy.

His real Mummy is rubbish & has refused to let him suckle as well
as sucking the skin off his tail.

I get to feed him & love him & hug him & call him George (or Eric)
for 1 night. He then gets put back with Mum again tomorrow
to see if she feels any more inclined to look after him.

I have just given him his 1st feed.

I tell you - if you haven't fed a day old lamb who wags his bloody,
skinned ickle tail when he sees you then you just haven't lived.

I am on Cloud 9.

Q - Sorry I missed your call - had fone on mute, can't disturb the baby.
Could you insert the pic of Eric please ?

Di & Ang - It's tough being a single parent isn't it ?

Cx

ps. sorry for Blog absence will explain all tomorrow when I have some time to myself.
Am ok tho, thanks for the welfare checks everyone.

Bad hair ?

It's an excellent look.

Even these kids would do as they are told with hair like that.

Cx

ps. Trudes - We always wondered how I would look as a (spit) blonde.

With a little bit of grapic manipulation , the ice queen lives down under , even maam has bad hair days

People have been asking what her address is and that they could not find the link in the archives.

AWATERE , MARFELL DOWNS, SEAVIEW ROAD, SEDDON , MARLBOROUGH , SOUTH ISLAND , NZ

Urban warfare.

All kids back today.

Back to picking up & puttng away & nagging for me.

Very draining to ask for everything not once, not twice but often 3 or 4 times.

Thank goodness the holidays are over.

Sent lots of e-mails (mostly whinging)

Cleaned the kitchen 34 times.

Or at least it felt like it.

Innes decided to ice all horizontal surfaces.

He says he was icing cupcakes but I don't believe him.

He went on to make bombs from baking soda & vinegar.

He looked surprised when I suggested it was an outdoor activity.

I suppose I will sound old-fashioned now when I say that even without
a puppy & a pony & access to a farm I didn't spend a minute indoors.
My Mum would vouch for that, come the school hols we
disappeared all day, frequently not returning for lunch in case we got collared
to 'do jobs' We turned up again as it got dark .

The weather here has been glorious for the last 3 days & is due to continue.
The kids have baked, watched tv & played on the computer.

Can't understand it ?

Chris & Trish due back in 2 hours, looking forward to handing the reins over.

6 months on & I tried sleeping in the middle of the bed last night.

Didn't like it & moved back to the right after 10 minutes.

Sleep tight you lot, whichever side you are on.

Cx

Why don't you go Q ? you never know - you might surprise yourself & enjoy it !

Let him entertain you.

Weird day.

Guess who I found ?

Boy.

Not only that because you would expect the body to turn up sometime.

Alive.

Went for a walk down to the river to try & escape the wind.

Have never been there before, a complete one-off.

Took Don & Chum with me.

Found a very steep hill I couldn't safely climb down, me & Chum took the easy route
but Don was determined to get down the slope.

I couldn't understand why but with ewes in lamb all over the farm I couldn't
trust him to come & find me later on. I started to climb down the slope & saw him
sniffing another dog.

I literally rubbed my eyes & thought I had seen a k9 ghost.

There he was, looking a bit confused bless him, but apart from that right as rain.

Turned out he has been living next to the offal pit for 6 weeks.
There is a small pond about 300 yards away, he must have been drinking from that.

I couldn't climb down the slope to get him without dislodging huge boulders which
I thought would be an ironic way to kill a dog I had just found so I went to find Mike.

We came back with the truck & some rope.

This is the sort of country he has been living in for 6 weeks.
I am now covered in gorse scratches.




Mike made short work of the slope down, attached some string to his collar
& began the slow process of getting him up the hill.
There were lots of breaks & encouragement.







The final result, a very healthy-looking Boy.



He actually looks better now than he did when he went missing.
His coat is beautifully shiny & lush & apart from being a bit smelly
he seems none the worse for his ordeal.

An odd thought crossed my mind after I found him only a mile
or so away from the house.
As he had lasted that long & looked in such good nick I did
wonder about leaving him there. I wasn't sure that a dog which
had found it's way there couldn't find his way back again if he wanted to.

I wonder if Mike thought the same thing because he said to me that Boy must have thought he had died & gone to doggy heaven being that close to all that 'fresh' meat.

When I offered him his usual tea of biscuits he turned his nose up at them so
possibly Mike was right.

I couldn't honestly have left him there though, I wouldn't have slept at night wondering if his food supply had run out or if he wanted to come home. I tied him to a gas cannister this evening as I thought he might take it into his head to wander off again.

An aminal story with a happy ending - now there's a change.

Zoe, Innes & Lizzie came back from Kowhai late last night.

Back to picking up & putting away for me,
cannot believe how quickly they decimated the house.

Time for bed,

Cx

Another contender for 'best day yet'

Azure skies, warm sunshine & playing with dangerous machinery.

I will mostly let the pictures tell the story as there have been lots of words over the
past few days.

Took Chum & Don around the cross-country-course today.

Tried some timed shots of us all with varying degrees of success


Gorgeous


Found a little something to keep the sweaties happy


Fissel - I am getting good now Kirsten - Hope you Like


My artistic work was interrupted by Mal & truck.
I jokingly asked him if he was aware he was towing a sheep ?
He replied 'Yes'


Extreme sports for sheep


Extreme sports for sheep


Headed back to the cattle yards, past the now empty pig pen to
take some shots of one of the tractors.


Ma' New Fwiend Trakka



Fed the old-timers,


Horace (right) & Kestrel (left)



My day ended with Mike asking me if I would like to drive the 'header'
or combine harvester as we know them.
Does a bear s*** in the woods ?


OH no More big machines

After driving around the lower paddocks & almost hitting a fence I didn't see,
I headed back for the shed where it is stored.
Mike said I could start to reverse it in but he would complete the manoeuvre as it
was a very tight squeeze. It was a rear-wheel steer & quite difficult to
manage as I couldn't reach the floor but I reversed it all the way in 1st go.
I tried to look nonchalant.
I have started a list for Santa, a header is at the top.
Wonder if it will fit down the chimney ?


OH no More big machines

First 2 lambs born today.

A good day.

3 kids get back tonight.

I will leave you with an image I hope doesn't distress too many of you.
I know there has been a lot of death, gloom & carnage in the last few entries
but I promised I would bring bad news as well as good.

All I will say is if you are of a sensitive disposition it's probably
best not to look at the next photo. It's just one of those cruel facts
of nature I am afraid.


I told you if you didn't play with me the wabbit would get it



I was getting in the washing this morning with Chum's help.
I had washed Humpy along with my bedding & placed him
in the washing basket.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Chum tossing something gleefully in the air.

I think so much of you lot that before launching a rescue I grabbed
the camera to record the act.

Have a good weekend,

love,

Cx

What a relaxing day,

No kids & the house & farm to myself.

Didn't get up til 0900, longest lie-in since I arrived.

Helped weigh cattle this morning.

Walked Don, played with Chum.

Finished my book, sitting in the sun.

Fed the neddies & that's about it.

Just back from roast chicken dinner at Mal's.

I think he felt sorry for me, being here alone.

I didn't like to tell him I was relishing the idea.

After dinner we watched 'Bargain Hunt' with David Dickinson
which felt surreal.

Very calming drive back through a bitterly cold night (1c)

The moon was full & hanging low over a completely black Pacific Ocean.

Another one of those 'Look at that' moments.

Nighty-night UK,

Cx

I am hyped !

Have just come back from T3.

Don't know if it's out in the UK yet so will try not to spoil anything.

Some criticisms.

The guy who plays John Connor is (in my humble opinion) poorly cast.
The kid who played the part was sparky & convincing.
This bloke looks/acts like he eats quiche.

The movie suffers without Linda Hamilton.

It is not as cleanly shot as the 1st 2, which I think were James Cameron movies
(don't know who the director is for this one ?)

However, this is just nit-picking because the film is funnier than the other 2,
loaded with more testosterone & features THE best chase-scene ever.
The female baddie (extremely foxy in head-to-toe oxblood skin-tight leather
& spike-heel boots) gets to drive the best vehicle you can (or at least I can) imagine for the chase sequence. Again, I don't want to spoil anything but think Maggie King on a blues & twos call for the damage quotient.

Arnie, even at 67, still looks ripped & has some very funny one-liners.

Look out for the scene where he obtains his customary head-to-toe black leather outfit.

Having huge difficulty typing as there is a fat cat with attitude on my lap.

I have also had to change my top as he paid me the ultimate compliment by spraying me as I was stroking him. Does that mean I am his bitch ?

The drive home from the film was in Chris's new car.

It is a champagne-gold 3.5, V6 Nissan Maxima & although I don't usually enjoy automatics I have to say I had forgotten the joy of kick-down. It is safe to say it was a spirited journey home.

Speaking of speeding, which of course I wasn't, I got stopped by the plod today.

I was within the speed limit, wearing my seatbelt & feeling quite smug knowing that I even remembered to say 'Yes officer, how may I help you ?' to the traffic cop who flagged me down.

It was a routine check so I was surprised when he informed me that the licence for diesel was 10,000 kms over what it should be. That equated to a $750 fine. I was very, very happy when he said he didn't want to give me the ticket & let me off with a warning. That was even before he asked what I did back home. What a great cop. Good teeth too.

We then chatted for about half an hour, turns out he was from Teeside & settled here about 15 years ago. He was so easy to talk to that I found myself telling him all about Coco, Kestrel, Ginger Tom, the pigs, Jess & the kids. He was in stitches & kept demanding to know if I was making it up. His Inspector came to ask if he was harrassing me & I told him that he was unlawfully detaining me. At the end of the stop he introduced himself as 'Dan - the highway patrol man' & said I can go out in any of the cars for a look-see.

He even stopped all the on-coming traffic so that I could chuck a u-ey & head for home. What a gent.

He has lived in Christchurch, Auckland, Wellington & now Blenheim & concurs with Bill's view of Auckland as a s***-hole. His message for you Bill is to police as far South as you can, but stop before you get to Invercargill, full of stroppy Scots apparently ? His words not mine.

It's nice sometimes to be part of the biggest gang in the world.

Weeny, the next bit is for you, cos I know you worry that I am wasting away here.

This is what I ate today.

Breakfast
2 slices of toast, butter & jam.

Lunch
An apple.
A slice of bread with peanut butter.
A steak & mushroom pasty.

Dinner
1/2 a fruit & nut bar.
Peach slices with cream.

Supper, before movie
KFC chicken popcorn.

Snacks at movies.
Popcorn & coke

I don't know how the apple sneaked in, I can only apologise. I was aiming for an entire day of starch, monosodium glute & sugar & I almost pulled it off.

Time for bed. Took Chris & Trish to the airport today as they decided to watch the last few days of the twins hockey tournament. Also took Genevieve to a friends so I am here completely alone for the 1st time since arriving. The peace & quiet only lasts til Friday when the other 3 kids return from Kowhai but I intend savouring the 1st quiet lie-in I will have had in 8 weeks tomorrow.

Thanks for all the messages about BM. You are a top bunch.

Cx

ps. One for the girls. Drove past the Air Force base tonight & about 20 young things out running in shorts, vests, crew-cuts & very large packs on their backs. Mmmmm.
Young man :)

Buenos nochas,

Just off the phone from Bill.

Even more disjointed than usual as he was typing case papers whilst listening.

Off to see T3 at a special preview (is it out in England too ?)

Later,

Cx

ps. got stopped by the filth today :)

Not the easiest of days.

My yearning for chocolate has been only partially sated by having a hot chocolate thing they call a 'milo' over here. Don't even have the usual bona-fide reason for wanting chocolate.

Where to start ?

Early morning call from a very fed up Stu this morning. His opening words were

'This isn't a wind-up'

It appears that as well as an import certificate to allow BM to land in NZ, she also needed an export cert to allow her to leave the UK. As to why nobody at DEFRA thought this was something that should be mentioned BEFORE the aminal turns up at the airport ? Who knows ?

Bottom line - another week to 10 days until she gets here.

Not really a huge problem except that I had arranged to take Wed & Thu off & was just really ready to see her. Oh well.

Next - the woman who has been to view my neddy Jess, decides to come & take her away for a trial today. To say that she was odd does her a disservice. I'll relay the conversation we had & let you decide.

You need to know that the only other time we met was 2 wks ago when she came to try Jess. I tacked her up, we exchanged a few pleasantries. That's it.

When she arrived today Trish asked me to bring Jess in from the paddock.

As I went to get her Sue asked me to wait for her.

She started ... (sounding very hacked off)

'I don't know if there have been crossed wires here but I am not taking Jess to do dressage, I am just going to hack her'

'That's good' says me 'cos she hates dressage'

'I know that' (snapped)

At this point, I look at her to gauge her expression.

She is staring at me furiously.

'You're English aren't you ?'

It's an accusation, not a question.

I confirm that I am from England.

'What DOES this horse like to do ?'

I reply that Jess loves hunting.

'Well, I won't be hunting'

The emphasis is on WON'T so I try again.

'You seem upset or angry about something, do you want to tell me what ?'

'Dont patronise me dearie, just go catch the mare'

To say that I was taken aback is an understatement, I don't like being spoken to like that at the best of times & especially not by someone who won't even tell me what I am supposed to have done.

I tell her that I don't care for her tone & ask again what the problem is ?

I am not being aggressive, I am just very confused.

'Will you catch this mare or do I have to go do it myself ? I do know a little bit about horses you see'

I actually stood rooted to the spot. My over-riding desire was to throw the head-collar on the floor at her feet & invite her to go get on with it.

3 things stopped me.

The first is that regardless of what I wanted to do, the horse belongs to the lady whose son died on Sunday. I didn't want this woman to add to her problems by complaining about the English groom who refused to catch the horse for her.

The second is the fact that I was representing Trish & the horsey community is very incestuous.

The third is just my professional pride. I was going to catch Jess & behave like a grown-up even if this woman couldn't.

When I entered the house to get Jess's travelling things I asked Trish if Sue had said anything to her to explain why she was being so offensive to me. She had not. I also told Trish that I was on the verge of telling her to sort Jess out herself. Trish told me I was welcome to.

I led Jess to the trailer & had to prepare her for travelling as this woman who professed to know about horses had not brought even leg or tail bandages for her to travel in. Again I fought the urge to leave them on the floor & walk away.

As I bandaged her legs Jess stood like a sweetheart, obviously thinking she was going hunting. Sue picked up one of the bandages & tried to help. As soon as she touched Jess's hind leg, Jess obliged by picking it up, thinking she was going to have that foot picked out. Sue didn't know how to get the foot to go back on the floor & said

'I think I had better leave the bandaging to you'

I completely ignored her.

She asked me what Jess ate, I really wanted to say 'Food'

I loaded Jess onto the trailer, feeling like a traitor, blanked Sue & wished her driver a safe journey.

I had such a huge lump in my throat that when Mal asked me if I was free to help him, I couldn't trust myself to speak. I unclipped Don & stomped off to the top pastures to have a blub. It's was so sad watching Jess go anyway as she has baby-sat me for the last 5 hunts but knowing she was going to an unbalanced fruit-loop was even worse.
The fact that Ben was whinnying for her didn't help.

Funny how things work out though because about 3 hours after they had departed Trish told me that the horse's owner wants her back. They have found a hunting family who are keen to have her & that will suit Jess right down to the ground. Needless to say, I offered to ring Sue & break the bad news but Chris thought that perhaps he should do it ?

What else ?

Oh yes.

Don is being sold.
Tea-Bag & Slurp are being slaughtered.
Kestrel has damaged his eye & lost the sight.
Millie is to be sold.
Ginger Tom is to be shot.

I'm not making the last one up - honest.

He has been skating on thin ice for a couple of weeks having developed the anti-social habit of spraying indoors. Yesterday, when the vet came for Kestrel, Trish asked if there was anything to improve GT's behaviour ?

The vet has tried him with an injection of female hormone. It seems to be working because last night he was trying to get into Genevieve's wardrobe.

I told Chris about GT's injection & he said he was in The Last Chance Saloon - if it didn't work he was to be shot. I had visions of Chris taking pot-shots at him on the lawn & curiosity got the better of me so I asked how ?

Parental guidance warning ...

He said he would put him in a box, give him some food & put the barrel of his .22 rifle to his head. He clarified, when he saw my expression, that he wouldn't miss.

I hope the injection works.


Slurp N Teabag

I was telling Chris we were out of peas for the pigs.

Doesn't matter, came the reply - they won't be here after Thursday.

I didn't suppose they were going on holidays but because I misunderstand so much around here I thought I had better ask. When he confirmed what I suspected, I tried a different tack.

'They're not very big are they ?'

He said they were huge.

"Well, what I mean is, they are not very fat are they ?'

'Good try' came the reply - 'I warned you not to name them'

As for Don. Chris doesn't like him, says he is too much of a 'wuss' to make it as a farm dog & is going to sell him to someone who has more time to train him.

Millie apparently behaved very badly at Pony Club dragging Innes around the jumps in a scarcely-controlled manner & so Trish wants to sell her because she is not an all-rounder.

Poor Kestrel has torn his eye. Not the eyelid but the actual eye. It has looked very sore & I have been bathing it a couple of times a day. Easier said than done because Kestrel will only be caught by a child so you have to find a child first.

I also had to give him an injection of antibiotic, again not easy as he is terrified of needles. I ended up having to twitch him, a process which although it looks cruel is very effective with horses.

With apologies to those that already know, the idea is that you take the horses upper lip & wrap a piece of thin rope around it. You tighten the rope by twisting it around a stick & hold it firmly in place. You have to go much tighter than you imagine the horse can stand. The twitch releases seratonin, a natural 'feel-good' or pain-relief agent.
Some horses are so nervous that they have to be 'twitched' even for clipping or shoeing and sometimes for control purposes on breeding horses.

The hairiest wee beastie here, Fergus violently objects to havng his mane pulled. He feels so impassioned about this that he has been known to lie on the floor in protest. I suspect I will be twitching him when I have to tidy up the bog-brush he calls a mane.

On the upside,

Today was gloriously sunny & beautiful to be out in.
Terminator 3 previews in Blenheim tomorrow so I am going to drive in & see if I can get tickets for the evening.
Schooled Honey in a baseball cap (riding hat has inadvertently gone to Kowhai in big truck with kids.) Didn't fall off. Didn't get brain-damage.
I have 2 days off now.
Q & Turbo came 2nd in the Sovs pub quiz

I feel better after off-loading, even if it is just to a computer.

No foties this evening so some name-checks instead.

Trudes

All becomes clear, you are welcome whenever. You are probably the friend who would be least shocked by the day-to-day carnage that is farm-life, having no compunction about blasting wee furry things. (joke)

Angie

How's the decorating going ? It must be fantastic to see Lorna again. Has she brought back 'Nice & lovely hair shampoo' in bulk. Say hi to her for me. Tell Nutty what happens to non-toilet-trained Kiwi mogs, see if she bucks her ideas up.

Stu

Thanks for ringing to let me know the new plans. Sorry you had a wasted day. How much did you pay the vet to say no ?

Mum

Well-how is it ? I am sooo jealous. I wouldn't keep my licence for more than a day driving one of those beasts out here. The garden sounds beautiful, look forward to seeing it a year on.

(Mum has treated herself to a Subaru Impreza after becoming bored of being mature & sensible in Renault Clios. She sold her 1st one to be a growed-up & never got over it. I promised I would buy her one if I ever won the lottery. She obviously found out I don't actually do it)

Turbo

Great to chat - even if it was cut short by my battery. What you didn't know is that whilst I was talking I was also taking off 4 horse rugs & carrying them to the corner of the paddock. No such thing as down-time between 0800 & 1200 you know.
There is 1 high-risk misper, a female juvenile, Slovenian, shop-lifting, self-harmer. I have sat on the paper-work all day, done no investigation, not allocated anyone to it & am telling you with 5 minutes before the end of the shift. Oh yes & the incoming duty officer is that bloke from B-team. (Just for old times sake)

Q

Thanks for the voice-mail. Makes much more sense than predictive text. Please get rid of it (same applies to you Turbo) Can't imagine what you thought 'Letter from America' was if not the answer to your quiz question ?

Letter From America

The World's longest running speech radio programme was first broadcast in 1946. Now you can read Alistair Cooke's weekly letter on the internet

Alistair Cooke has presented BBC Radio 4's Letter from America since 1946. He was born in Salford in l908, educated at Blackpool Grammar School and Jesus College, Cambridge where he gained an honours degree in English. Alistair joined the BBC in 1934 as a film critic and in 1935 he became London correspondent for the National Broadcasting Company of America. He started reporting for the BBC in l937. He has presented television programmes, hosted Masterpiece Theatre in America for 22 years, and written many books.

In 1973 Alistair was awarded an honorary knighthood and in 1974 he addressed the United States Congress on its 200th anniversary. In 1991 he received a special BAFTA silver award for his contribution to Anglo American relations, and in l992 the Broadcasting Press Guild's Radio Broadcaster of the Year and Outstanding Individual Contribution to a Programme by The Voice of the Listener and Viewer. Alistair Cooke lives in New York with his second wife. He has two children.

I love that poem, have read it at least a dozen times. It must be very thrilling to know you have made such an impact on someone that they immortalise you in poetry. I am very jealous. I am also relieved to know it was written by a proper 'writer' If you are still in contact please tell HIM (I stand corrected for my sexist assumption) how much I enjoyed it. RSClarke has not replied ? The Blog comments are not snide as such, just only things you could know having read it ? Thanks for adding the pics to promptly to Blog.

Bill

How swish is that house ? Still being new to pooters I cannot get over having a virtual tour of a house. It all looks so pristine & I can see myself savouring a big red on that decking. (hint) Check out the panoramic shot of the bathroom though. There is a v.scary reflection in the tiles. I am assuming it's the guy using the camera but for a moment the hairs on my arms stood up (reminded me of the ghost pic that scared you in the dead of night) The thought of the Met being ahead of another force/service in the terms you explain is not so surprising. I am constantly suprised to hear some of the language around me & I think it's because the Met has affected us more deeply than we care to admit. Not necessarily a bad thing. Don't worry about the call - as & when. I feel exactly the same about the days rolling into one, it's a Kiwi thing I think.

Justine & Malc

I will reply soon, honest. About to have 2 days to myself. Will send a full update then. I am curious to know what the hunting's like in England. Have you done any Justine ? I have a fantastic foto of Goo Goo with one of her progeny. I will get it copied for you, it is v.cute. Your garden must be looking gorgeous at the moment. Is Malc still being Lord of the Manor in his Le Chameux wellies as he strides the High St with the locals pulling at their forelocks ?

Bloo (1st time caller)

Your lot look like they know how to have a good time. Good shirt.

Wot no Weeny ?

Have they made you lot actually do work & not start the day with Blog & coffee ?
More updates with house-hunting please.

Di

Still awaiting pics of the window-boxes ? How goes the decorating ? Did you get the water cleared up or will I be returning to a sunken Japanese water garden feature ?
Are you taking it easy with William & is he still VLD ? 44 weeks to go.

Creaky

I was thinking the other day how much I miss the Control Room. Not.
How's the nagging, aching pain in the neck ? Does he still wear that blazer ?
Love to Mrs Creaky.

Rocky

How's things in the Big Car ? Any good fights lately ? On or off-duty ?

Tony

You were in the local press over here the other day for saving a baby.
Did I miss something ?

Way past my bed-time so night-night all,

Hugs gratefully rxd.

Cx

NEWS FLASH

BARLEY HAS NOT BEEN ABLE TO BOARD THE FLIGHT

MA BRIGGS NEEDS A HUG

SO LETS ALL SEND HER

ONE IN FACT TWO

WHY NOT ITS THE NEW MILLENIUM

CHIN UP BOSS

I'm not very proud of myself for whining earlier about lack of 'quiet time' especially having read that the kid's parents arrived at the accident scene shortly after it happened.

Trish has been very upset all day & said to me earlier

'Guess us Kiwis aren't so tough after all, I have wept all day'

I have never thought people deserve prizes for 'being tough'

I suppose Blog is an instant editing tool & the fact that it is supposed to be 'now' doesn't allow for reflection. One of the things I admired about Q's Blog was it's immediacy, it's honesty. He wrote how he felt, what he thought, without worrying whether people would approve.

How old do you have to be I wonder before you stop caring what people think ?

My Mum said that if I were to consider publishing Blog I should definitely leave in the replies to other people's e-mails. She went on to say they showed the 'real me'. I suppose she is telling me what I know already. I don't let people in easily.

After Weeny & I first got speaking (& I won't go into details suffice it to say it involved a lavatory) she said to me ..

'I am amazed I like you - I thought you were a real stuck-up starchy knickers'

Talk about damned with faint praise.

I know what she means though.

If I am in an unfamiliar situation or nervous of new people I purposefully give out a 'don't approach me' vibe.

A perfect example is when the management at the nick invite Joe Public in to the Control Room to have a look-see. I know what I should be saying is

'Welcome, come & see what goes on fair tax-payer'

When in fact, what I am thinking is

'Go away, foul & loathesome new people'

I'll never make a new friend again after this will I ?

I wish I were more like some of my friends, Q & Cocky spring most readily to mind. People who seem perfectly at ease when socialising. People who can hold a canape, drink a drink, remember someone's name. Not talk with spinach stuck to their teeth.

Keep eye contact.

For that reason, I won't be editing out my earlier comments today but maybe learning from them a bit.

Enough analysing for now, I will leave you with some pics of


Feeding Out

Nite-nite you lot,

Drive safely,

Cx

Seddon youth dies in crash
14 July 2003

A 17-year-old Seddon youth was killed near Twizel yesterday after the car he was driving collided with two others on State Highway 8.


Jack Griffith Mills Bristed died when his Mazda Familia hit a trailer travelling in the opposite direction near the Lake Ruataniwha spillway at about 1.30pm.

His parents, who were following in another vehicle, arrived at the scene about 10 minutes after the accident.

Four other people, one in a serious condition, were taken to Timaru Hospital by St John Ambulance.

Constable Greg Sutherland of the Tekapo police said the youth had been travelling north when the accident occurred.

The Mazda first hit a trailer being towed by a vehicle travelling south. The occupants of this car, a Dunedin couple, were not injured.

The Mazda then spun into a second car, also travelling south. A man and woman in this car were also injured, the man seriously. Mr Sutherland said the man was in a serious but stable condition this morning.

The two other people taken to hospital were a young woman and a youth who were also travelling in the Mazda.

The crash closed off State Highway 8 for about two hours.

Police were still investigating the cause of the accident but Mr Sutherland said there was no ice or snow on the road at the time.

Although there was some fog, visibility was about 300 metres and he did not believe this would have contributed to the accident.

Volunteer fire brigades from Twizel and Omarama attended the scene, along with police from the Twizel, Omarama and Dunedin

Hi folks,

Very odd day today.

Weather is overcast & cold enough to be unpleasant if you were standing around but ok if you are on the move. Just back from a hack on Ben, he is having 2 weeks worth of walking as he has ben diagnosed with an arthritic joint which is a worry at only 9.


Ben (on right) Shrinky (on left)


The family don't have much time for him as they say he is thick but I find him an amenable little chap, so much so that I hacked out in a woolly hat today (too cold to swap it for my riding hat) There are not many horses I would trust to do that but he doesn't have a malicious bone in his body.

Whilst Trish & Chris were returning from Christchurch last night I received a tel call to inform them that the 17 yr old son of one of their close family friends died yesterday in a car accident. Hence the very down-beat atmosphere today.

The plans for the week have also been knocked into a cocked hat. Chris & Trish are no longer going away Tuesday due to the funeral but are postponing their trip til Thursday which means I don't get any quiet time that I was looking forward to.

I know that may sound selfish & I apologise if it sounds harsh, maybe I just need a day off having been working for 8 days now. Chris has arranged with me to have Wednesday & Thursday off & I am collecting Roo on Wednesday so we can have 48 hours to play & explore the farm.


Chum


I am also in the bad books for taking Chum (Innes' new working puppy) for a walk this morning. Innes is away for a week so I am feeding & exercising the puppy. It seems that with a working dog you cannot let them play & gambol around your feet you have to flick your heels up smartly to catch them in the jaw to prevent them from playing around your feet.


'What the cattle thought of Chum'

The reasoning behind this is if you are working on high country & the dog trips you up it is possible to fall to your death so it's a serious fault. Chris told me in the nicest possible way & he was obviously embarrassed to have to do it but I still felt like a thick townie.

Oh well - you live & learn.

Will try & download a couple of foties of the truck at the start of Saturday's hunt & maybe add a bit more to this entry tonight when I am feeling a bit more upbeat.

ttfn,

Cx