I wish to register a complaint.

When I came away it was with the understanding that normal life for my friends would cease. They were to don black veils & not speak in public except to say how much I was missed.



Fun was a definite no-no.

News reaches my ears that a certain Di Herrett plans a celebration of a birthday this Saturday. Not just any old birthday but a special one (I won't tell you which one but she's the last of my friends to reach this age-only a baybee) Not just any old party either but a fancy-dress party ! Knowing full-well I have never been to a fancy-dress party !!

Doubtless there will be alcohol, laughing & licentious behaviour.

I AM GUTTED !!

I now have to rely on Cocky's promised 'Bad-taste' fancy dress party when I return.

Have a lovely party Di & I hope you get lots of luvverly pressies - can't wait to see the pics.

The 2nd piece of shocking news is that a certain female at VK is applying for her EO's. It's enough to make me pack my suitcase & fly home. I had to breathe deeply into a paper bag when Andy txd me this morning.

All I have to say on the issue is 'Leave D team alone'



'Who's the Daddy ?'

I was feeling a bit sorry for myself last night. I had kept busy all day but at bedtime thoughts of NY & friends at home conspired to get me thinking.

I have decided I don't get home-sick as such, just people-sick. I then got to thinking about Roo & wishing I had her on my bed to give a cuddle. Dangerous ground.

The blue sky this morning has restored my spirits, typing this whilst Michelle feeds the animals & with Pachelbel's Canon quietly in the background.

A good result yesterday at the kids speech day yesterday. A 2nd for Alice who looked like she was going to faint when her name was read out & a 3rd for Harriette

Unfortunately, the pics I took aren't up to much thanks to a lady in front of me with a particularly large head, luckily Michelle got it on video.

Some of the kids speeches were very funny, I particularly enjoyed the one by Paige about mice. She didn't take a breath for 3 minutes & apparently she is like that all the time. Her parents must be knackered.

I feel very behind with kids names these days. Some I have heard over here already are Cushla, Kowan & Serena as well as the usual sprinklings of Brittanys, Jordans & Sugar Plum Fairies (ok I made the last one up)

A grim job beckoned for Eric yesterday afternoon. Having heard nothing from 'cowdown' he was obliged to put Gertie down the offal-hole.

She had been in situe for 48 hours & had blown-up as tight as a drum. I offered him a hand to drag her across the paddock up as far as the offal hole.

Unfortunately, all the cattle were grazing in the adjoining paddock, including Gertie's Mum, Ermintrude.

Eric put down some feed to try & keep Ermintrude distracted whilst we got on with moving Gertie.

She wouldn't fit down the hole so Eric had to puncture her chest cavity to release the gas. You can only begin to imagine the smell. Thank goodness it hasn't been warm here. I caught a couple of nostrils full & almost greeted my lunch again so I tried to move upwind & breathe through my mouth.

It didn't lessen the impact at all & the stench was so bad I could hardly blink as it dried my eyeballs.

Poor Eric had no such option & had to stand over the carcass pushing & shoving it into the hole.

I tried to stand in between Ermintrude & Eric as she was keen to see what he was doing.

Finally, Gertie disappeared & immediately Ermintrude rushed over to the concrete cover of the pit, alternately sniffing & lowing mournfully. I have no doubt she knew what was down there. Very sad.



In the meantime, the other calves stood together, not playing as usual but just looking at Ermintrude.




On the way back up to the house we came across Bin enjoying his bone



"Not short of a feed or two ..."


And I used the last couple of shots on the camera to capture some of the chocolate arums I mentioned the other day & some freesias growing well here.







This evening we are going to watch Waikato take on the leaders of the NPC league Otago. I feel torn as Otago is in the South Island & Waikato are now my local team. It's so much easier when Waikato play Auckland as no-one likes Auckland.

After the game we are going to friends of the Tanners for the weekend. Michelle did tell me where but I have forgotten already. She has already warned me 'it won't be a slimming weekend'

It will be my last entire weekend off probably until about April so I intend making the most of it.

If I can't Blog over the w/e then wish me luck for my 1st day on Monday & have a fantastic time on Saturday Di.

Cx

ps. You still haven't told me which film-star you are going as ?

All viewers / readers / voyeurs.

Please check the archives there has been some colour added.

Not all are done yet as some have not yet arrived please be patient with Maam & Me.



Harriette , Alice & Moi

Njoi 'cos I is shattered

Qx

Good evening,

Typing Blog during a quiet evening.

Girls in bed, Eric studying, Michelle gone to her last night duty this week.

I really feel for her going off to nights just as everyone else is winding down & relaxing. It's something I never got used to & don't miss at all now. She has to eat her dinner with one eye on the clock, things will be so much better for her & the family when she works normal hours from home.

Things have worked out quite neatly for the last couple of weeks whilst I have not been working. I cook on the evenings that Michelle works which means she can have a decent sleep & Eric can get on with the 101 things he has to do around the farm.

This evening it was toad-in-the hole & gratin dauphinnoise.

As the toad went to the table Alice said

'Please don't take this as a criticism but that looks a bit of a disaster-area'

Kids - don't you just love their honesty ?



Toad in the Hole
Prepare a Yorkshire Pudding batter:

¼ cup of bacon dripping
½ cup milk
1 egg, well-beaten
½ cup sifted all-purpose flour
¼ teaspoon salt

Fry sausages and lay them in the batter. Bake as for yorkshire pudding:

Temp: 450º F Time: 10 - 15 min. If you use a glass pie plate turn the heat down 25°F.

Detailed directions

Combine a well-beaten egg and milk; beat till light. Gradually beat in sifted flour and salt; beat with dover beater till smooth. Let stand 30 minutes.

Put about 2 tablespoons bacon dripping into pan or divided up between 6 large muffin tins or into an 8"x8" pan. Heat in oven, make sure you watch pan as it will start to smoke! Pour batter into hot pan; and lay in your sausages. Serves 4.

The trick is the hot fat and the hot oven. Don't keep opening the oven to check. Serve immediately as it will deflate as it gets cold. Pour nice beef gravy over top.

Serve with Mash Potatoes, Marrowfat Peas and Gravy

British Food & Traditional recipes


Her other outstanding moment this week was when she was recounting a conversation she had been having with a boy who sat next to her. He asked her what it was like being a girl ?

'Just like a boy - but without the penis' came the 8yr old reply.

Classic.

There is much excitement in the Tanner household this week as both girls have made it to their year's final of their school's speech competition. Tomorrow morning we all go off to see them speak. Please let the both win or both lose. Any other result will be emotional.

A sad start to the day today as the girls discovered, on their way down the drive to the school bus, that Ermintrude's calf Gertie had died through the night. Eric had seen her sunbathing the evening before & she was fine so at the moment we have no idea what she died of. She was a strong, healthy calf so it's a mystery.



Ermintrude

Poor Ermintrude has mooed vigorously & sadly all day. She must be tremendously uncomfortable with udders full of milk but she is not tame enough to hand-milk to relieve her. Eric is going to call the vet to enquire about an injection to dry her milk up quickly. I know we shouldn't project our own anthropomorphic ideas onto animals but I couldn't help but feel very sad for her as I watched her today. She really did seem to be searching the paddock & she kept sniffing the other calves to see if they were Gertie.

There is also the problem now of how to dispose of Gertie. There is a local company who remove dead calves but they only take yearlings & over. Eric has called another company 0800-cowdown (honest) & is waiting for them to call back.

If they refuse, then the offal pit looms which, strictly speaking she is too big for & Eric would have to dismember her to get her in there.

During dinner this evening there was the most remarkable transformation in the sky.
All day today it has been hot & sunny, in fact the first properly hot day I have enjoyed in the North (it has rained at some point every day since the 17th Aug). I called Michelle out to look at our local landmark the Hinuera Stones.

They were golden in the evening light & just a tiny segment of valley was illuminated in this one wedge of sunlight. The rest of the sky was a brooding greeny/purple like a large bruise.

As we started to eat the sky turned green. I know it sounds odd but it was like when you look through 1 half of those 3D glasses. The paddocks were intensely green & the air had that pregnant, shimmering quality that I last remember feeling during the eclipse in the UK.

Within minutes the green had gone to be replaced by a dusky, intense pink. Now, stretching far away was a thick, heavy, pensive cloud which scraped over the tops of the hills. Directly above the hills was the tiniest sliver of bright, pale blue sky.

It was all gone in a matter of minutes & then huge, fat, musical raindrops began to beat on the roof of the car-port. Quite the most enthralling sky I have seen since arriving in the North.

In a couple of hours it will be September 11th here & it & the people I went to New York with have been on my mind. I find myself thinking about the families too & how they will be marking the day. My memories are fresh & pin-sharp. It's odd now to know that whatever else happens in my life I am unlikely to find myself involved in anything that resembles those few weeks.

Hi to Di, Chef, Robin & Lolly - thinking of you all.

Good-night UK, take care,

Cx

Aah & so they come ...



Cx

Deck immediately outside 'my' cottage

Hello from the Shire & a special welcome to the early-turners PS, KW, HS, PW, AT, & CD.

Had a call from Kevin @ Trelawney yesterday asking me to bring my start date forward to next Monday. I wanted to say no & that I would start on the 20th like we had agreed as that would give me exactly 1 month between jobs but something told me that might not look too keen.

So I start work @ 7am, Monday. Long hours 7-5, don't mind as long as it's busy.
If it's not busy will be looking for summat else.

Yesterday Michelle & I dropped into see Eric at work whilst we were in town. He had made the mistake of mentioning there were pups in the pound & needless to say we had to go look.

I can't imagine a more grim place to keep animals & I don't envy Eric his job.

The 'pound' was a graffiti-covered, brick-built unit about 3 metres by 12 on a piece of scrap-covered, council-owned waste-land. No windows & about 5 cages inside. It was dark, damp, & dank.

The 'inmates' yesterday were the 2 pups & a handsome, dignified older dog who had more than a touch of Rotty judging by his magnificent ginger eyebrows. The pups were lovely (apart from smelling the way you would expect after being locked up for 2 days) they were about 6 weeks old. One was brindle & very squeaky & the other was a fawn colour with a white chest. Both looked of GSD descent.

This part of North Island has a bad problem with stray dogs & it's Eric's job to round up strays. He makes all the checks he can but the fact is if they are unclaimed after 7 days they are destroyed. I have no problem assisting any animal out of it's suffering if it is old or unwell but I just could not be a part of destroying healthy young animals.

It's a part of his job that Eric dislikes too but unfortunately there is no way around it.

NZ dogs have to be licenced, needless to say, many are not.

I keep meaning to tell you about 'bobby calves' & keep forgetting.

This is sad, don't read if you know it will upset you.

The Waikato area is primarily dairy cattle land. The ground is heavy & rich & excellent for grazing cattle. When the calves are born (this time of year) only the heifers are kept ie. the ones which produce milk. The bull calves are sent for slaughter at a couple of days old.

The price paid originally for one of these bull calves was a bob hence 'bobby-calves'.

During calving a 'bobby-cart' (truck) calls at each dairy-farm to collect these calves.
The calves are left overnight in a metal cage at the end of the driveway & on the road.
Michelle pointed one out to me & explained it's purpose. I am glad to say I haven't seen one in use yet.

I was surprised to read in the local paper here 'The Waikato Times' that some Kiwis have reservations about the use of these crates. I was surprised because I just assumed the locals accepted it as part of farming life & that only softies like me thought it sad.

A couple of locals have been complaining that the men who collect the calves manhandle them too roughly & also that the calves should not be left in the crates overnight but should be put in there the morning the truck is due. A healthy debate is now raging in the paper with the men who do the job complaining about poor pay & those opposing them saying they should not be working with animals at all.

Again, it makes me grateful that Mal & Mike always handled the stock at Marfell with patience & care. Their reason for doing so was financial as well as humane because the Works can refuse to take a beast with bruising as it affects the taste of the meat.

However, as Mal explained to me, if you injure a steer the 1st time you have contact with it, your job is that much harder the 2nd time.

I had a very long chat with Mal last night, it was lovely to hear the farm news.

GT has calmed down considerably & Mal told me 'even Trish petted him yesterday'
Bet he hated it really :)

Don continues to work although he didn't think much of going on the bike with Mike the other day, Mal wonders if Don is a 'girl's dog' as he loved going on the bike with me ?

They are receiving a couple of hundred heifers in the next few days so have been checking & repairing all the electric fence boundaries. The grass has grown very long as they have not had cattle (except for 2) since I left.

The ponies Ben & Honey competed at a show in Christchurch at the weekend.

Paddy & Ben did a storming x-country round but were penalised for missing a jump (rider error not pony) Good news, I really like Ben.

Vinny & Honey (evil yellow one) came last in the dressage and fell on the x-country. Both were ok after being checked by doctor & vet respectively.

Oh. Dear.

The laundry-room floor has not been seen for several weeks.

Mal's ribs are less painful but he suffers some discomfort when climbing into the tractor. I suggested a small trampoline might assist.

He ended the call by telling me to take care around the 'young buggers' at the stud who would as soon a 'kill you as look at you' I assured him I would be taking no risks around them. If it comes to me or a yearling tearing past me & escaping my money's on the horse escaping. I have got this far without a broken bone, I don't intend starting now.

I went to a quarry to collect some gravel yesterday. The gravel is to go over a weed-membrane at the side of the pool. As I arrived at the quarry I was waved to follow the tractor driver. At home you would have to wear a hard hat, reflective vest & wouldn't be allowed anywhere nr where all the works vehicles were.

Here, I just set off after the tractor driver, who wasn't hanging around, right through the excavation area with all the diggers, tractors & lovely assorted, yellow big things right up to the 100' pile of gravel.

As he dumped the gravel in my trailer he gave me a thumbs-up & I was off.

We didn't speak a word during the whole transaction.

NZ's like that.

So, that's my job today. Have just had toast & lemon curd for brekkie & as I type I can hear that a chicken has laid an egg.

We had 6 yesterday & that's what they are laying every day. Eric says he'll threaten them with the pot earlier in future !

Bye for now, still waiting for photos, it's like Xmas !

Cx

Greetings England.

No weekend Blog cos I have spent the w/e sending pics to Q for your perusal.

2 very pleasant days of gardening, burning (tiny, CONTROLLED) fires,weeding
eating & generally catching up with all the corres I have neglected since
my move from South to North.

Welcome to 2 new readers, Hadders & Pete the G.

Hadders, it's like you said 'What happens on the island - stays on the island'

Blog is the same, not for general team perusal.

Pete, I still giggle whenever I think of you & funerals. I told the farm-hands at
Marfell Downs.

Same reaction as the Cad Room that day. Shock, disbelief then uncontrolled
mirth.

I understand the Big Guy has been 'helping' you in Custody. Never a dull moment I bet ?

'Quick, quick, the guy in Cell 4 is pouring paraffin over himself as Q yet again tries to explain the workings of the live-scan system !'

Welcome to you both, Hadders I can see you settling down for your daily fix with a cup of tea & your pinny on. I miss your cups of tea here, it's just not the same making your own.

There has been no water here since yesterday. There is a problem with the pump which supplies water & the call-out charge would have been horrific for the w/e so yesterday was bottled water which Michelle had set aside in their 'earthquake provisions' As I went to bed last night someone had thoughtfully provided a bucket of pool water outside my french doors for the flushing of the loo.

It's the Kiwi equivalent of a hotel putting a choccy on your pillow I suppose.

The chap has just turned up to examine the pump. It's really bad news. He says that the pump is stuck & if he cannot dislodge it it may be $10,000 to rectify !! That seems an unfeasibly huge amount of money but as you can imagine, even if the people can do without water for a while on a farm the stock certainly can't.

The irony of the torrential rain last Wed/Thu/Fri is not lost.

He looked at Ben (pronounced Bin over here) & said 'He's not short of a feed or two is he ?'

Quiet day planned today, going into Whatamata with Michelle to get some stuff for the garden & transfer some $ to a GB account.

Just heard from Lindsay that Pippa Funnel won Burghley which is good news (her yard is a couple of miles away from Leith Hill, so I consider her 'local') & more surprisingly that Neil Hodgson won the WSB World Championship. As pleased I am that a Brit has won it I would be more pleased if he were a Tyke & not a Lanc !

Must go now, will be logging on this evening hoping to see pics.

Night-night all,

Cx

ps. Forgot to say ... the fire brigade came past yesterday morning.
I didn't hear them but Michelle says they gave us a blast on their 2-tones !
A 'thank-you' for the Waikato Draught & Export Gold no doubt.

On that note, I went to bed on Saturday night after dancing up & down on
the remaining embers from my fire like some latter-day overly-large
Rumpelstiltskin.

I awoke an hour later & could smell smoke !

I rushed to the windows expecting to see an inferno.

There was nothing to see so I started to go back to bed.

I couldn't leave it at that tho & had to go down the drive in wellies & d.gown to check there
was nothing still alight. As I re-entered my bedroom I realised the smell of smoke
came from the clothes I had been building bonfires in.

Der !

:)

Photos coming soon

I have received some new piccies and edited a part of the archive to view the received pictures.

They are located here.

Weeny Warning

NB.

Not for the faint hearted , do not be eating

Updated archive with new piccies

It has taken me 2 weeks to suss it out but in my defence I have to say I was just relieved that someone was being friendly.

The reason the Tanners are being so lovely can be explained in 4 words

Pate de Fois Gras

They are the residents of Royston Vasey & I have unwittingly stumbled into a grim & macabre plot to fatten & consume visitors.

Alarm bells should really have rung as soon as Eric told me he used to be a butcher's assistant.

'A pound an' 'alf of special is it today Mrs Tanner ?'

For any of you not familiar with the practice I will explain.

The French (no surprises there) began this practice.

Goose-liver is considered a great delicacy when processed into pate & to make the liver more fatty the goose has it's gullet forced open & grain poured directly into it's stomach, thus bypassing the need for the goose to be hungry before it will eat.

The Tanners are following the same process, albeit more subtly.

When I arrived I had, for the 1st time since I can remember (probably 1995 if I'm honest) a flat stomach & could see my feet unimpeded in the shower. I am now back to that 3-months pregnant look & I blame the Tanners & mostly Michelle.

You might be saying, why not just eat less but how would you manage when every time you look around the kitchen table is buckling under the weight of the freshly-baked goodies ? I feel like I am on the set of 'The Darling Buds'

For example, yesterday it rained all day. Michelle made lemon-curd, a beef curry, Indian pea-soup & gingerbread. This was on top of the pumpkin soup I made for lunch. I made enough for 6 & between 3 of us we finished it all.

As I sat down to the curry at dinner-time my gut was still distended from the soup at lunchtime. It's still uncomfortably tight now & yet I can just hear, through the Tupperware container the gingerbread breathily calling my name.

Oh yes & get this. Michelle said the gingerbread tastes better after 3 days. As if.

The baking isn't even a one-off. On Sunday she baked double-chocolate muffins, macaroons & flapjack ostensibly to go in the girls lunch-boxes I know, but if that's the case, why does she leave the box within my grasp ? (with the aid of a ladder)

It's raining again today & yet I know I must manoeuvre my huge bulk outside & waddle around & do something to burn off the 6,846 calories I consumed yesterday.

This is starting to sound horribly Bridget Jones

Fires started this wk = 0
Employers I haven't got on with = 1
Horses that have killed me = 0
Glasses of red wine = 5 (they are big ones though)

My good news is that I have finally worked out how to e-mail Blog pics to Q.

If you have been reading recently, may I humbly recommend you go back to my last day at Marfell Downs & see some 'up to the elbow action' unless you are of a timid disposition or are eating.

My other piece of news concerns my baby, the Blade. Rumour has reached me that the pansy who dropped it on a country bend has now given up biking for good & has sold her one to someone who owns a pair. (testes that is) He has also stopped wearing suits to work & can now be seen about town in a rather fetching frilly pink dress.

I am currently awaiting an update on who owns my pride & joy now.

On that biker note Bill is now enjoying a posting at Auckland Central Traffic. He was in the process of applying for their motorways unit when a skipper who overheard him talking about it on the phone poached him. He still works from Auckland but now does b***er all & drives flash, properly maintained vehicles.

The only difference from UK traffpol as far as we can work out is that over here traffpol are called 'snakes' rather than 'rats'.

I looked on a site yesterday which gave you your biker name (are you able to put the link in here Q ?)

Mine is 'Bitch of the Dirty Drunkards' which I think has quite a nice S&M ring to it.

Bill's is 'Greasy Bill of the Satan's Barbers'

Eric's is 'Sheriff of the White Werewolves' (quite apt, ex Plod)

& Michelle's is Momma of the Spirit Stalkers.

Hours of fun for all the family.

Must go now, developing bed sores from this excess weight, just one quick welcome to a new Blogger.

Hello Mud - if you've stuck with it this far you will see why my e-mails have been sparse lately. You are probably a bit behind with the Trumpton jokes too, but feel free to get stuck in. Everyone else has.

ps. Mud was the 1st person to notice that my texts to UK arrive a day after the one you lot are on thanks to the time-difference. He has asked me to send him the Lottery numbers from Saturday back home to him on Friday. Eminently sensible I thought. As long as we go 50% on the winnings then I can move all my chums out here & buy my own neddy.

Take care you lot,

Cx

stand by for foties in the next couple of days.

Greetings from a soggy Shire.

The mouse is beginning to hack me off, bring back the zebra or the thick pig.

It is belting down outside so it sems a good time to Blog.

Michelle said 'It was lovely weather before you came, in fact it's always nicer when other people aren't here so can you leave please ?'

I am glad I got lots done yesterday cos it doesn't look like it's going to clear up today.

Dug over a large chunk of the veg plot then started weeding/raking all the flower beds around the house.

Noticed an arum lily in the beds, not surprising as they grow 'like weeds' here. What is surprising is it's colour. Rather than the white variety we are all used to this one is deep, chocolate brown & beautiful.

Yesterday was one of those days when every time you think you are finished you look around & notice someting else. My aching back testified to a busy day.

After lunch Eric offered me a tea. An hour later I noticed it hadn't arrived. Thinking I would be amusing I went & squashed my face up against the kitchen window where he was supposed to be fixing cupboards. In my wellies & waterproofs I adopted my most pathetic expression & began whining "Teeeeaaaa" in the same way I do back at work in the UK when I think Andy should earn his keep by making one of his really good cuppas.

At that point I noticed Eric was not in fact fixing cupboards but was on the phone trying to order some fencing supplies. Oh well - I found it funny.

It got him back for the fact that he hadn't informed me I was weeding in his mousey-graveyard. 3 times I put my hand on rotting corpses.

On a more prosaic note, I wanted to tell you about the birdies here.

Q - if you can find any pics on t'internet to accompany these ramblings for Bloggers I would be grateful.

All day yesterday I was aware that I was listening to birdsong. One of the reasons I was upset to leave the South was because of all the different birds I saw & heard every day. I needn't have worried. They are just as prolific here.

The bird that features most largely here is the magpie. Less showy than it's UK counterpart & looking more like a pied crow without the long tail, they are everywhere. Their song is magical, not for them the hoarse chuckling & cackling that the UK ones indulge in. Here, they are reminiscent of Clangers on acid with a touch of yodelling goatherd. They make a noise which sounds like "wardle-oodle-ardle"

I am especially fond of them because I remember waking on my very 1st morning in Rangiora on the 14th May & wondering what the beautiful, exotic birdsong was.

The sound has become NZ for me.

My favourite birds here are the fantails. Bright-eyed, curious, pretty little birds, they are very comfortable around people who they follow as we stir up the insect life they live on. About the size of a blue tit, they come in either biscuit or chocolate colours & as their name suggests have a long, elegant tail. They were always much in evidence at Marfell Downs whenever I was taking off the horses rugs. They came close enough for me to feel I could quite easily capture them. Their song is an unmemorable 'peep peep' but their looks make up for it.

There are parrakeets here which are lovely to look at & don't make the irritating 'skreeeech' which the escaped green ones in Surrey do. I remember thinking that I could happily shoot those birds whilst listening to them all day long every time I played golf at Bushey golf club. The NZ ones here are predominantly scarlet, have white cheeks, yellow throats & love to perch in the trees here watching all the goings-on.

The most arresting bird I have seen so far here is the Harris hawk. About the same size as a UK buzzard ie big, they flourish here & are regarded as vermin. It's a shame as they are stunning birds with the most gorgeous plumage of various shades of red & gold. I must easily see 10 or so a day & I still enjoy watching them glide lazily over paddocks & verges in search of ickle things or road-kill.

One of the paddocks with a pond at Marfell was home to a pair of Paradise Shelducks. These birds mate for life & can live (if I was reliably informed by Mal) for up to 70 years.
Their call is the most un-birdlike I have ever heard. A kind of 'zoonk zoonk' when alarmed, like an amplified Space-Invader game. Eric has said he would like to slot them - I will be checking to make sure that if he finds any he kills them both. The thought of a solitary, celibate, lonesome shelduck is more than my soft heart can bear !

Kingfishers here are like ours but GM'd. They are MASSIVE. Easily the size of our mallard ducks. Ok, I am exaggerating, they are about a third again as big as UK kingfishers but much less secretive. I don't know about you but I was 31 before I first got a good look at a UK kingfisher & even then it's only because I was spending a lot of time fishing. To see a perched kingfisher is a rare treat back home. Here you are likely to see them in trees in most places. They are just as lovely as the ones I am familar with but instead of a brilliant coral breast it is more a salmon pink.

The wax-eye or silver eye entertains me by balancing on & feeding from the red-hot poker flowers directly outside my bathroom window.




Outside my bathroom window


Dainty little birds, they are shy & easily frightened & remind me of our wrens.

There are lots of birds here to remind me of home, wood pigeons, blackbirds, sparrows by the sackful (which is lovely now that they are endangered in the UK) mallards, herons (smaller) yellowhammers, thrushes and goldfinches.

As for kiwis, none of the locals I have spoken to have ever seen one. As well as being rare, they are nocturnal & I am told my only chances of setting eyes on one are is a reserve or sanctuary.

The Tanners keep a lovely selection of chickens, all of which are laying for England at the moment. 6 eggs in a day is not unusual. They have a couple of bantams (one white, one black) a couple of Rhode Island Reds, a couple of Light Sussexs, a Brown Leghorn & some black ones with a tinge of blue (the name of which escapes us at the moment) Michelle has just gone to look it up & they are 'anconas' "I think"

When I am weeding I save all the slugs I find & then give them to the chickens. I love listening to them as they find the tasty morsels amongst the greenery. They make excited little 'ooh' noises like elderly ladies at a Bric-a-brac sale. The slugs must make a welcome addition to their pellets, there are never any left after 5 minutes at any rate.

If our little feathered friends leave you cold then I apologise for the last few paragraphs of my wittering but I love them & really appreciate being outdoors all day where I can watch them.

Has Bill Oddie's new series started yet back at home ? Wish he was my Dad.

Anyone who records & sends me the tape will earn my undying gratitude.

Sunday afternoons, a tray of tasty nibbles, a good bottle of red & BBC2 wildlife programmes are one of the things I miss most about home.

Well, I have decided to make pumpkin soup for lunch & the sun looks like it might be trying to squeeze through the clouds so I must away. Michelle is pottering around the house on her 1st day off & once again I thank my lucky stars that I landed in such a hospitable household.

I also wish to give an alibi. Yesterday there was a 'controlled avalanche' on an abandoned snowfield near Taupo ski-fields. There have been 2 big quakes in S.Island recently of 7.1 on the scale. The quakes had dislodged some of the snow in N.Island so it was deemed sensible to clear the loose snow. The 'controlled avalanche' rapidly became 'uncontrolled' & ended in ski-fields which were being used by skiers & snowbaorders.

I don't think there were any fatalities but I would just like to state clearly & for the record that I was at Cedar Lodge all day yesterday & didn't go anywhere near Taupo.

ttfn,

Cx

Spent the morning at the stud yesterday.

Watched the vet ultrasound a mare. Mucked out a couple of boxes. Picked up poo from a foaling paddock (in the pouring rain with a wet bum from the quad seat) Caught a couple of almost wild youngsters & transferred them to a less boggy paddock. Watched, part horror & part amusement as one of the other girls, Kirsty, a wee thing, went mud-surfing along behind a nutter who dragged her around the paddock behind it. Cleaned out the feed room & lusted over the tractor which was being used to throw away tonnes of weevil-infested oats.

It confirmed what I thought on Monday.

I can't quite work out why I feel awkward there. Loads of neddies, beautiful grounds & on the face of it, a professionally-run operation. At morning tea, no-one spoke to each other apart from a few comments about the weather. I also know it takes at least a month for people to accept you in to their humour & to treat you like one of the crew.

The MD is an arse who man-handled me when he explained how he wanted me to hold a mare. I think you have to know someone pretty well to go hands-on in a work situation, especially if they are of the opposite sex. The least I think you should do, if you need to demonstrate something physical is adopt a 'may I ?' expression as you approach them. I had to bite my tongue & was very close to saying 'Who do you think you're shoving sunshine ?' He is very arrogant & most un-Kiwi-like.

The prevailing attitude seems very sexist & when the rosters were published yesterday for mare-watch which is 5pm-8pm one of the girls, Ellie was very put-out to find out she was doing it the same day ie.no notice for working overtime. She had to pay her neighbour to feed her horses. What struck me as odd is that they have an admin woman - why can't the roster be prepared a week, or even a day in advance ?

Anyway, I was very glad to leave there at 12pm & as I left I suspected I may not be returning. Brent gave me a contract to look through & says he wants to start me either the 13th/20th so I suppose that gives me some breathing time.

Spent yesterday evening on the net looking for other farming jobs.

It's a shame cos it's 20 mins away, pays reasonably (slightly more than Trish altho it's 6 days per week, rather than 5) & the Tanners have said I can stay in the flat for a very reasonable rate which means I wouldn't have to stay in their cheerless accommodation.

I would also be learning loads, when I listen to the staff talk, I can only just work out they are talking about horses, loads of it goes over my head.

I suppose it's what they call a safety net whilst I carry on looking. I am in 2 minds about the job-search. Half of me says take my time & get the right job & the other half wants to be contributing properly to the household.

Anyway, enough self-absorption for now, I only came in for a 5 min break from digging the veg plot. It's hard going as it has rained pretty much every day for the last 2 weeks but the results should be worthwhile. If Michelle's other veggies are as tasty as the leeks it's a job worth doing.

Night-night England,

Cx

Hello there,

Spent the day at the stud today.

Met Mark Todd this morning which may not mean much if you are non-horsey.
If you are horsey you will know that he is commonly acknowledged to be one
of the world's leading horsemen.

He has won Badminton numerous times & is an Olympic team member.
I am sure that by the next time I have read this Q will have inserted some blurb
to back up these sparse details.

Famous New Zealander

Mark Todd
Born 1 March 1956 in Cambridge.

Gained Diploma of Agriculture at the Waikato Technical Institute.

In 1977 he was a member of the first New Zealand 3-day eventing team to compete in a world championship, at Lexington, Kentucky.

As an unknown competed and won the 1980 Badminton Horse Trials (3-day event) on Southern Comfort.

In 1984 at the Los Angeles Olympics won individual gold on Charisma, then won gold again at the Seoul Olympics in 1988. Charisma was then 16 years old, and was retired after the Games.

Married Carolyn Berry in 1986.

In 1992 at the Barcelona won team silver, but was unable to compete in the1996 Olympics at Atlanta because of an injury to his horse.

Won Badminton again in 1994 and 1996, and Burghley Open European Championship in 1997.

In 1999 an international poll named him three-day eventer of the century.

In 2000 at the Sydney Olympics he won bronze with the New Zealand team.

After the Sydney Olympics retired to breed horses on his farm near Cambridge.


He is now devoting more of his time to breeding & training racehorses
(successfully by all accounts) & he came to look at his mare, Chablis, who foaled
yesterday. Foals are beautiful anyway, but this one was a complete stunner.

Chocolate brown, fading to biscuit-colour from the knees down & with a star & a snip on
it's face (don't know if it was a colt or a filly)

As we were standing there looking the owner approached, I thought 'He looks familiar'
& was then introduced to Mark Todd. He was very nice & chatty & took foties of his new
foal just like any excited owner would.

I also saw Van Nistelrooy in the flesh today, layer upon layer of rippling muscles &
only 3, he certainly is a handsome boy.

I have spent the day being a bit spare-partish as you always are when you are new.

There is something odd going on there & I can't suss it out. The atmosphere is as if
there has been a big row & the dust is settling. What did concern me is that each time I spent time alone with a staff member thsy would be criticising another.
Not good for a happy working environment.

The only one who didn't do this was Trina, one of the head girls, she seemed knowledgable & professional. The other girls were typical horsey girls, totally horse-p****d. What did jar was their language which was absolutely filthy.

I was told if I didnt swear when I got there I would when I left. I disagree, I found their language over-the-top & I couldn't tell if they were laying it on extra thick for my benefit.

I came away today with a negative feeling about the place, probably not helped by the fact that I got wet early on in the day & spent the rest of the day cold & wet.

Even riding my 1st quad bike didn't lift the impression that I might be making a mistake.

Kevin has asked me to start at 7am tomorrow so I can see the vet side of things.

I will see how I feel tomorrow. Kevin indicated that if I accepted the job I could start work next week. The difficult thing is that today people seemed to be looking for jobs to do & yet that I know they have 40 yearlings arriving in a couple of weeks & so then it will be much busier.

I keep thinking that my gut instinct was not to like Trish & it turned out right.

Something about this place is odd & I don't want to have been there for 3 months before I find out what it is.

Cx

Q,

Please could you change the weather forecast thingy ?

I hate seeing the word Auckland on my Blog.

If it is the closest place then apologies but I have no interest in knowing what
the weather is doing in the City of Sails.

I am a pwinceth !

Cx

I have to confess.

I have never GOT Harry Potter.

I have spent the last few years avoiding everything to do with the speccy t**t.

I have long suspected that the whole thing is a hugely hyped crock of poo.

I will admit that anything that gets kids to r-e-a-d rather than push buttons is a good thing but that's as far as it goes. The Redwoods were always trying to convert me & I resisted stoically. The Tanners had a more direct method.

Last night whilst I was on the phone, they tackled me en masse, bound me hand & foot, stuck a chloroform gag over my mouth & nose & propped me within inches of the tv whilst they played the video to indoctrinate me.

Well, as good as. Michelle baked home-made pizzas & poured red wine, both were left strategically in front of the tv & next to slouchy couches. I admitted defeat & sat down to watch. If you are a Potter fan skip the next paragraph.

I thought it was awful. Precocious child actors have always left me cold. The only exception being the kid in Jerry Maguire & Haley Joel Osment or is it Joel Haley Osment, I can never remember ? (sp?) By the same token I always call Tommy Lee-Jones, Tommy lo-jeans (inadvertently) The kid playing Harry seemed only capable of one facial expression (gormless) the girl was eminently slappable & as for the gingwah ? Need I say more ? What does puzzle me is how they persuaded so many good actors to take part. Filthy lucre I suppose.

Still, all was not lost. Michelle & I swooned every time Alan Rickman spoke & tried to explain his attraction to Eric who doesn't fancy him at all. The girls don't get him either, I explained it will come with age, like a rite of passage.

The whole Potter-experience has left me wondering if I am really compatible with my new family. Maybe they will put me into care now ? Still - they aren't LotR fans so I suppose we will just have to try & understand each other's funny little ways.

I had long chats with both Mike & Mal yesterday.

Mal has taken a fall after catching his trouser-leg on a trailer tow-bar. They suspect broken ribs but his idea of convalescence for a 78yr old is no time off work & some pain-killers. They broke the mould with that one. He is glad to hear I am happy & was very tactful about his references to Trish.

The other bad news is Geraldine, Chris's elderly Mum has fallen & been admitted to hospital. She was always lovely to me on Tuesdays when I took Genevieve to visit & I asked Mal to pass on my best wishes through Chris.

Mike cheered me immensely by telling me that the ponies have only been exercised 3 times this week, which means they stood idle for the other 4 days. He also said that the girl was having problems with the 'evil yellow one' who he saw 'acting about & tossing it's head whilst the girl was trying to exercise it in that square thing' (Mike's description of the dressage arena) It seems that Sally, one of the former nannies who had helped for a week had disappeared again leaving Trish to do everything alone.

Oh dear.

The woman who was supposed to cook & clean never materialised which means Trish must be running the household single-handed. Hopefully she will have lots of time to think whilst doing all those menial chores ?

Don continues to progress, now learning to drive sheep away rather then just bringing them. Ginger Tom rules benignly over the humans & Chum is making 'steady, sensible progress'. Mike has had to do 2 caesarians on dead/dying ewes but lost both lambs involved.

Well, the veg plot beckons, where Michelle is toiling. The girls are having a 'Who can hold their foot in the cold pool-water the longest ? competition & Eric has just finished making 1/2 a tonne of home-made sausages. I told him they looked almost as good as shop-bought. he wasn't in the least bit impressed with my compliment.

Anyone else old enough to remember that very funny 'Generation Game' when they made sausages ?

Cx

Just in case we feel the need to compare Kiwi Fire Bods with Brit Fire Bods , purely for all you girlies and those of you that fancy male bodies NZ Fire Service -

No more Prodigy jokes pleeeeeease ????

The best one so far is from Bill who suggested I may want to help British Gas
rekindle their advertising campaign.

Remember their phrase 'Come home to a real fire ...'

I don't think anyone will beat that but feel free to try.

He also suggested we have song titles & has got the ball rolling with

'Come on baby light my fire'

Hot Hot Hot - Arrow
Disco Inferno - Cue Briggsy manic running around
Beds Are Burning by Midnight Oil
Burn by Nine Inch Nails
Burn by Cure
Burn Down The Mission by Elton John
Burn for You by Inxs
Burn Hollywood Burn by Public Enemy
Burn Out by Ash ( double points for that one )
Burned by Barenaked Ladies ( double points for that one
Burning down the house - T. Heads
No Smoke Without Fire by Wishbone Ash ( triple points on that one )
The Unforgettable Fire by U2 ( APT )

I have just come back from Matamata. I dropped off 4 crates of beer for the chaps
& grovelled profusely.

The door was opened by a gorgeous, sleepy-looking 'young man'

I apologised for waking him & said 'You know that fire you attended on Thursday night -
I'm the buerk that started it & these are for you & your mates for saving my hide
for turning up so promptly'

Lunch-time now - will finish this later.

Considering they are all volunteers & had to come from 10 kms away, the Fire Brigade arrived remarkably quickly last night.



Let me explain.

I spent the whole day yesterday raking leaves & fallen branches from underneath the pine trees which line Eric & Michelle's driveway. It has been many years since they were cleared & some parts of leaf litter were up to 4 feet deep. I started many small fires to clear the piles, all of which smoked away merrily without producing too much flame.

Although it was hard work it was enjoyable watching the bulk reduce quickly. Each time I took a breather I would lean against one of the big pines & watch Eric's multi-racial flock of sheep in the adjoining paddock.

At dinner time I looked at the still smouldering piles & decided they would just burn out but that it might be wise to check on them later.

Famous last words.

After dinner we began to watch Ice Age & at 8.30pm Eric headed off to do a night-time drive for work. The residents of Waharoa are somewhat lax with their dog0care & just turn their dogs out to fend for themselves at night-time. There have been many complaints & in response to this, Eric & his colleague Steve were doing a night-time patrol.

As Eric left the farm, the leaves were still smouldering in little piles.

We all turned in for an ealry night & I was listening to a talking book about an hour later, when I heard Michelle calling, no, shouting my name. I thought maybe my tape was on too loud but wondered why she was shouting loud enough to possibly wake the girls.

I turned the tape down & got back into bed.

When she shouted my name for a 3rd time I began to worry.

I looked out of the french doors from my flat & followed her pointing finger.

There was a huge blaze in the place where I had been burning leaves.

'I have called the Fire Brigade' she yelled before dashing off towards the blaze.

In the next few moments I can safely say, I could not form a single, intelligent thought.

I ran a couple of small circles in my bedroom before realising I should put some clothes on.

I was about to run out in bare feet & a dressing gown before realising this was not ideal clothing for fire-fighting.

After pulling on jeans & a fleece I ran out to help.



The scorch marks reach 30' up this tree.

I cannot over emphasise how sick I felt as I got closer to the blaze. It was huge. It covered about 30 square foot, the flames were at least 10' high & they were igniting the huge pine tree which towered above them. This pine tree was the 1st in a line of about 20, all of which led up the driveway towards the Tanner's house. To make matters worse, the tree now on fire was next to an outhouse in a paddock which contained most of the stock, certainly all the sheep.

What followed was maybe 10 minutes of the hardest physical effort I can safely say I have been involved in. Luckily, there was a big, circular water-trough in the paddock adjoining the blaze. We ran backwards & forwards in the dark on an increasingly muddy path throwing water up a bank at head-height on to the fire. The smoke was acrid & choking & it felt like my lungs were going to crawl out of my chest.

To make things more interesting, the fire was circled by an electric fence. I would be lying if I said I didn't expect a shock with every bucket of water I threw over the fence onto the fire.

I am shaking as I type this.

The fire was still going strong but we had taken a considerable edge off it when Eric said we should leave it now for the Briade. Up until now, no-one had spoken. I didn't know what to say & they were too busy.

Within 10 minutes I saw the fantastically reassuring red lights which heralded help.
I have NEVER been so pleased to see a fireman.

With all the right equipment & a thoroughly organised routine, the guys had the blaze extinguished in another 10 minutes. They spent another 30 minutes damping everything down & checking there were no embers.



Charcoal anyone ?

At this point, Eric turned to me & said

'This will make interesting reading on Blog'

Michelle gave me a big hug & said 'I feel awful cos I know how awful you must feel'

Were ever there more understanding people ?

It's no exaggeration to say that my stupidity put their house, farm & selves in danger.
Not to mention the kids.

All they could say was 'Don't worry'

I didn't sleep very well last night as you can probably imagine.

Michelle is a very firm believer in fate & she just said calmly that it would have been a great deal worse if Eric hadn't spotted the blaze when he was coming in from work.

Apparently, he saw an orange glow from quite a long way off. You can only imagine how he must have felt to realise it was coming from his property.

I have been running thru all the 'what-ifs' & can't stop thinking about it.

What if Eric had been delayed at work ?

What if the fire brigade had been dealing elsewhere ?

What if I had just raked & not done the burning ?

Pointless, I know but last night was the closest I have come to throwing up due to shock. It will give me more sympathy now when I speak to shocked people. I couldn't think straight for the rest of the night.

As we walked back to the house for a cup of tea, Eric said 'Worse things happen at sea'

I am going into Matamata today to drop off some crates of beer at the Fire Station.
I think it's the least I can do. Then it will be a case of waiting to see if I am billed for their call-out. As they were cleaning off their gear, Eric pointed out that as volunteers these poor guys would have to be getting up in a few hours to do their normal jobs.

How bad do I feel ?

I can't remember having ever done something which put so many people's safety & livelihood at risk before. I did once leave the gas-taps on at my middle school on a Friday afternoon to see if the school was still standing on Monday, but I don't think that counts as I was only about 13. It was a very sobering lesson & saying sorry just doesn't seem to cut it.

I think I'll stick with weeding today.

Cx

Good evening UK,

Went for my 2nd interview today & spoke with Brent Taylor (the guy quoted in the article below) The place still looked as lovely as ever but something about today put me off.

Brent was at pains to make sure I understood that there was absolutely no riding involved, I replied that I supposed I could ride locally to assuage my need & he said that the only riding you could do would be on horses who are led on a rope for people that can't ride.

Kevin was assisting in the interview (the guy who interviewed my the other day)

When Brent asked Kevin where he saw me slotting in with the yearlings, Kevin said that as an ex vet-nurse he saw me helping out with new-born foals with health problems & that I may be assigned to look after just the one foal for a few weeks.

At the conclusion of the interview Brent offered me the job but suggested I shadow Kevin for a couple of days to make sure I liked what I saw prior to signing on the dotted line.
I am going to work with him on Monday & Tuesday next week.

As a director I know my day-to-day contact with Brent would be minimal but he still left me feeling slightly uncomfortable. I should have been elated when I left but I wasn't - just a bit bemused.

I think Brent wanted me to say that I had a burning desire to work with Thoroughbreds & it was the culmination of my professional life to date. Truth be told, it's a job I am checking out cos Geoff Spark set me up with it & I wasn't prepared to bulls*** him otherwise. Stroppy Tyke that I am.

What I did notice there was how immaculate the sheep-yards were. The tractor was beeyootiful too. The Tanner's neighbour knows Trelawney's farming manager Murray very well & said they might be prepared to put in a word for me.

Job opportunities are like men aren't they ?

I will see how I feel about the place after a couple of days of 'hands-on' next week.

In the meantime I have a couple of other fingers in pies thanks to some local contacts.

Michelle & Eric's neighbour has put me in touch with a lady who is a horsey oracle.

I spoke with her about 10 mins ago & she has suggested a couple of families who may be able to help. The first do beef, sheep, polo & eventing & the 2nd are a well-known horse family in NZ called the McVeans. Daughter Katy is prodigously talented & qualified for the Grand Prix at Hickstead this year, despite being too young to be able to take part.

In the meantime, Trelawney have said I can start mid-September which gives me 2 weeks to advertise myself in the local paper. I told the lady I spoke to that I would consider moving anywhere for the perfect job but in an ideal world I would like to stay close to my new-found friends the Tanners (they do a cracking Sunday morning cooked breakfast)

After my interview I went to Matamata, bought some pansies in a garden centre to put in my newly-weeded border next to the house, browsed around RD1 (u were right Q) a great farming supplies shop which stocks everything from apple-favoured horse-wormer to bottle-green ladies boiler-suits (might have to get me one of those) & then headed back to Cedar Lodge.

A huge slab of Michelle's home-made bread with lashings of home-made lemon curd for lunch & then Eric & I cracked on with shifting a load of decking planks into his trailer to enable me to continue clearing the beds around the top of his pool. Lots more burning this afternoon :-)

Eric has kindly let me use his car whilst I have been here & it was a very pleasant surprise to see what it was after Michelle disparagingly referred to it as 'The Heap' I suppose it is a bit scruffy compared to her lovely big, shiny jeep but I love Eric's car. It is a hulking, great, Nissan Safari 4WD in steel grey. 4.2 litres with a front-winch attached. It makes a very genuine chugga-chugga noise whan you drive it & reeks of testosterone. Fableous. Wonder if Eric will swap it for a Henry ?

After more garden chores we sat down to an early dinner then Michelle had to leave for nights again. The difference between the Tanners & the Redwoods after school makes me wonder if both are part of the same species.

Here, the girls come home, are asked to tidy their rooms, do their homework & most importantly, no TV. As I weeded yesterday I could hear Harriette's gentle warblings on the treble (large recorder minus the screechy dying cat overtones) & Alice practiced piano.

Chez Redwoods I would have been esconced in the kitchen preparing a meal which would have gone mostly uneaten whilst the brats would have been screaming, fighting, eating junk food & worshipping the god that is tv in their household.

Please don't think from reading this that the Tanners children are angelic cherubs with shiny, happy faces always leaping to do their chores. There are the usual disagreements, contradictions & 'he said, she said' that I suppose go on in any family. Bedtimes are the same as they were at the Redwoods and as far as I can remember with me as well. Procrastination, (can I get a drink then ?) denial (but I'm not tired) blackmail (but I need a cuddle) & finally acceptance.

The difference here is that when I ask one of them to do something for me, they do it 1st time not 4th time or never. They also eat the food that is put in front of them which is very gratifying & makes cooking a pleasure. At last I get what my Mum was always telling me.

Well, it's time I wended my way off to Bedfordshire, so I'll bid you all goodnight.

Lolly - forgot to say yesterday, nice to know you catch up regularly, look forward to
a real e-mail. When can I publish 'The Photo' for all of Blogdom to enjoy ?

Cx

VAN NISTELROOY TO TRELAWNEY STUD IN NZ.

Van Nistelrooy - the world's most expensive yearling sold at auction in 2001 - has been retired from racing due to injury. He will shuttle to Trelawney Stud in New Zealand for the upcoming season after a deal was brokered by New Zealand Bloodstock and Adrian Nicoll of BBA (Ireland). The son of Storm Cat will enter quarantine later this week and be shipped to New Zealand in early August.

A $6,400,000 yearling purchase, Van Nistelrooy impressed many observers when landing his first three races as a two-year-old, all at Ireland¹s racing headquarters The Curragh. The third of these was the Group 2 Futurity Stakes in which he recorded a faster time than recent winners of the race and subsequent superstars Hawk Wing and Giant's Causeway. Three weeks later, in the Group 1 National Stakes, Van Nistelrooy was narrowly beaten into second by this year's Group 1 English 2,000 Guineas winner Refuse To Bend.

As well as a race record, Van Nistelrooy has the pedigree to make a stallion. He is bred on the same Storm Cat/Halo cross as the ill-fated Harlan, who sired multiple Grade 1 winners Harlan's Holiday and Menifee before his premature death. Enthusing about Storm Cat as a sire of sires, acknowledged expert Alan Porter noted in Owner/Breeder magazine that sons "Forest Wildcat, Hennessy, Storm Boot, Harlan, Future Storm, Delineator, Storm Creek, and Illinois Storm have all sired at least one major stakes winner better than themselves."

Trelawney Stud's manager Brent Taylor commented: "He was a top notch two-year-old; he's by the right sire; and you couldn't find a nicer looking individual anywhere in the world. We're really excited about standing him and I think he'll offer breeders here fantastic value."

Good evening guys,

Firstly & most importantly, condolences to all the poor sods who have to work 'Carnival'
this weekend. Those whistles should be taken & forced where they can't be heard.

Had a good day today. After yet another lie-in (3 now) I weeded the bank behind the
pool & burned all the dead stuff.




The bed what I weeded



Doesn't sound a big job but the bank must be 12 foot high & probably 4 times that height in length.

I took all day & still haven’t finished.

Good to be out though & very satisfying to see a tangible result to your labours.

Unlike cad juggling.

Lovely pasta carbonara courtesy of Eric & the chickens (5 eggs laid yesterday!) then
kids to bed & Michelle off to start night duty.

She had an interview today for the district co-ordinator for the whole of Waikato.

They were so impressed with her experience they offered her the job there & then.

The package isn't all she had hoped for financially but they are offering 4 weeks leave & working from home so she is giving it some serious consideration.

I had a call from Trelawney stud asking me to see their director tomorrow at 10am so I will let you know how it goes. Still undecided as to whether to take the job or not.

Another possible link into farming is Bill's sister. She knows a family in Matamata (doesn't everyone?) who have a large farm. He doesn't know what kind of farm it is but has said he may be able to put me in touch with them.

I am also going to put an advert in the local paper along the lines of 'I am .... & I would like ...' & just see how it goes.

Yesterday was a lovely day.

In the morning we tagged, tailed, marked & vaccinated the ewes & lambs.

Eric tags his ram lambs in the right ear (r = ram) & ewes in the left (l = errr).
This is so he can see at a glance without looking at the business end, which is which.
The equipment for tagging looks similar to the things you punch holes in leather
except that a yellow plastic tag sits in the jaws ready to go in the lamb's ear.

The lambs don't seem to object as long as you do it quickly; the ewes are obviously much braver than the rams. Only one lamb had serious reservations & as soon as I had put the tag in she kicked at my arm & tore the tag straight out leaving a split ear & Eric wearing a lot of blood on his t-shirt.

Tailing consists of stretching a very tight ring over the lamb's tail so that in a month's time the tail falls off. This is because leaving the tail on encourages fly-strike. They take tails off shorter here than they do in the UK & I can only think it's because they shear larger flocks more often & the shearers find it a nuisance shearing around a bit of tail.



'Michelle at the business end of a ram lamb'


Marking is when a ring is placed around the rams testicles; they too go the same way as the tail once the blood supply has been interrupted. An occasional ram lamb would lay down convinced he couldn't walk due to the ring. Cissies.

Vaccination was a 5-in-1 job for the nasties that sheep get. I have just asked Eric what they get & promptly forgotten & I don't want to disturb him as he is doing research for his job.

All the ewes & lambs were also given a dose of something yummy which resembled molasses as a tonic.

Michelle is a dab-hand with the foot-trimmers & so she got busy with some chiropody whilst Eric removed 'dags' with some hand-shears. A stripe of pink raddle on the head finished each ewe & lamb.



1. \Rad"dle\, n. [Cf. {Ruddle}.]
A pigment used in marking sheep, and in some mechanical
processes; ruddle. ``A ruddle of rouge.'' --Thackeray.


1. \Dag\, n. [OE. dagge (cf. {Dagger}); or cf. AS. d[=a]g what
is dangling.]
A loose end; a dangling shred.

Daglocks, clotted locks hanging in dags or jags at a
sheep's tail. --Wedgwood.



Pepper was also given a dose of the tonic as well as a jab of penicillin after her swimmimg lesson the other day. She seems to have picked up well now that she is segregated & she has filled out considerably in the last couple of days.

Hopefully, her ill health is behind her.

After our lamb-wrestling we went off to Tauranga & Mt. Maunganui which is North East of here for the afternoon.

Tauranga, city in New Zealand, in northern North Island, a seaport on the Bay of Plenty. Located on a main rail line, it is a major shipping center for wood products, wool, and dairy goods. Manufactures include processed food, building supplies, clothing, and printed materials. An Anglican mission was established here in the 1830s; the community then grew as a port and a defense post. The name is from a Maori word meaning “sheltered anchorage” or “landing place for canoes.” Population (1998 estimate) 89,800.

Mount Maunganui: "Mauao - Mount Maunganui literally translated meaning 'Big Hill', is the dominant geological feature of the Tauranga District.
Guarding the entrance to Tauranga Harbour the dormant volcano rises to 232m (761 feet) above sea level.

The plan was to walk around the Mount & head for the thermal pools. In reality we were all too knackered to do the walk so we did a gentle stroll on the beach & then went for a long,hot soak.

The pools were as busy as Eric & Michelle had seen them but we were comparing it to a similar type of place in the UK & saying that we could not imagine being able to find anywhere to sit if we turned up at 5pm on a Sunday at home.

The beach was beautiful at Tauranga, white sand & ickle scattered islands of lush vegetation. It's possibly the most posey place I have been to since arriving with a long, wide, boulevard in front of shops. Needless to say the young kids had gravitated there to cruise in their cars & show off their shiny wheels & wide exhausts. I would have done just the same at their age (except I always had Minis, not the same pose value)




Tauranga

Even so, the mood was lighthearted, no Old Bill being heavy-handed & just the one overly loud car stereo. Michelle said good afternoon to 5 Maori youths. They were dressed in the regulation street-wear, surfer shorts, huge trainers or barefoot. Every one of them returned the greeting.


pics 627 & 628



As I type this, one of the labs, Ben, is snoring contentedly. He is sleeping head-to-head with his brother Inca, like bookends & I have just taken a lovely piccie.



The Boys


Will try again with my foties after this. I have asked Q how to insert my pics directly onto Blog without having to e-mail them to him 1st so fingers crossed you will get to see some of the Tanners environs soon.

As I was weeding today, I heard a car arrive home & my heart sank.

I wondered why & then realised that I used to associate that noise with Trish returning home. I hadn't realised it was so engrained in my sub-conscious. It was good to realise that the car belonged to Michelle & that I was looking forward to hearing how she had got on with her job interview.

Things are so much more together here. I would love to see Michelle take charge at the Redwoods & show Trish how to really organise a household. It is only 8pm here & yet the girls have been in bed for 30 mins. Zoe would routinely be arguing about going to bed at 10pm. The girl's lunch-boxes have been prepared by Eric & the kitchen is clean & tidy with the dishwasher humming away.

I don't think I ever started Blog earlier than 9, despite officially finishing work at 8pm.

Mike's news from Marfell Downs is that the sum total of horse exercise done this week was 30 minutes for Honey (the She-Devil). I can't imagine why this is as they are now employing someone specifically to do the neds but I will ask when I next speak to him. He delivered 160 lambs this week, losing only 4 to wet & cold weather on Friday. One of the deliveries was by Caesarian. Would love to have helped with that one.

He has said he will happily provide a reference for any farming job I apply for.

It's been a while since I left any messages here so by way of apology for my outburst yesterday when I was feeling badly done to, here are some quick name-checks.

Lindsay - Great aid parcel thank you. It was well-worth the wait.
Can't decide whether the tt's are most appreciated or the pic of BM
(which has always been my favourite as you know)

Ang - Poor you, updating your CV on a BHW. You still haven't told me what's happening
at work but if you are updating your CV I am guessing it's more of the 'drowning not
waving' scenario. Chin up poppet, come & do farm-work with me, long fingernails
are so over-rated. Thanks for the incredibly regular mails & the consistently
entertaining 'funnies' you forward.
I don't always have time to reply but I appreciate them hugely.
Especially loved the 'keeping warm' one.


Trudes - Yes, it was weird, will e-mail you separately, loads to tell.

Di - Where are you ????? Are you deep u/c ???? Good luck for 27th.
36 weeks to go.

Stu - Fantastic news about your sister (say hi to her for me) Your folks must be thrilled.
Can't believe she has actually decided that town-life sucks after all.
Good luck in the new job, think you start this week ?
Remember, flares & platforms obligatory though not necessarily the matching
tie & sister's dress thang that your Mum was so fond of.
Aim 'Burnside' & you won't go far wrong. Slaaaaaaaaaaaaag.

Weeny - Do I need to commence a f.585 or are you just bogged down with moving-type
stuff ? Neeed tales of Murphy & smelly office Kylie-fan.

Cocky - Know you don't have access to e-mail so I don't know if you know about the stud
yet. They asked if I had any Irish in my ancestry whan I went for the interview.
Apparently the prospective owners love to hear a bit of Blarney.
I told them that I knew some Irish people & did that help ?

Mum - To clarify my text. He had 2 young kids in Oz & his wife had taken them there to
prevent access. He wasn't truthful & I got some very bad vibes about the situation.
If, in real life he is a sweetie we can laugh about this later.
Anyhow, the Subaru rep sounds much more promising.
Have written Granny's card, just need to get my ass in gear to post it.

Andy - You must have some credit by now. Come on, don't be a stranger.

KW - Introducing him back to the public. Who needs protection from who ?
Missing the BHL double-bubble but not the hedge-clipping disputes.
Please forward some 'must-sees' for me via Q when you are not doing
hours of interminable paperwork (ha) How's the golf going you bandit ?

Lovely Col - Mentor ? Mental more like. How's it going ? Acquired any more bike bits
to test Mrs.Colin's patience or still trying to shift the last lot ? I am thinking of
buying a bike as everyday transport rather than a car for over here. The weather
is more conducive to a bike than the UK & doing the off-road stuff really
whetted my appetite for bikes. It won't be anything flash like the Blade but I
am seriously thinking about it.

Finally, I felt upbeat enough last night to look at my little going-away package of cards & foties for the 1st time since arriving. Mistake - blubbed immediately, especially looking at a particularly gormless one of BM with her looking like she had borrowed a bigger dog's tongue. Oh well, Mums always recommend having a 'good cry' don't they ?

Bye for now, off to soak my poor aching back in a deep tub.

Take care everybody,

Cx

Hello again,

Cant believe my time is going so quicky, I blink & two days have gone & Blog is neglected.
I am struggling on this laptop too, everything takes me twice as long so these entries may well be shorter than you are used to.

I think I was telling you about my interview. It was certainly the most laid-back one I have ever had. It consisted of a tour on the quad bike whilst Kevin gave me the history of the place.

Every now & then he would stop to point out some day old foals or brood mares.

The place is enormous, about 450 acres & some of the most pristine countryside I have ever seen. I could already imagine myself giving some of you the guided tour.

The only thing that wasn't perfect was the accommodation. Remember in the 70's when we all liked brown ? It was shared & the 'designer' certainly was fond of brown. It wasnt dirty or anything just utilitarian. And brown.

I know I must sound like a princess.

I thought about the job all day yesterday wondering if I would take it if they offered it to me.

I reasoned that if I am working outdoors in such fabulous surroundings then my room is really only where I lay my head come the end of the day. having said that, I do like to live somewhere nice & staying in my pretty ickle holiday villa chez Tanners hasn't helped.

What to do ?

The place had a really organised feel about it, I won't elaborate more now cos I have other stuff to tell you but I suppose I don't need to think about it any more until I go back. The way it was left was that Kevin said he would like me to go back for an interview with one of the directors.

I will keep you posted.

At the end of our chat he asked if I had any previous stud experience. I was totally honest & said none whatsoever but I am willing to learn. His reply was that he was pleased as they had just had a couple of bad experiences with stud staff from the UK who were a 'pain in the arse' as they thought they knew it all.

NZ's like that.

He told me his pet hate was people who walked past obvious jobs to come & ask him 'What can I do now ?' At that point a gormless looking lad came to find him to ask just that.

'See what I mean ?' he said.

Yesterday evening I went to my first Kiwi rugby game. What an experience.

Michelle, Alice & friend were sensible & stayed in with chocolate & videos whilst Eric, Harriette & I headed out into the rain to the game.

Their local team, Waikato were playing Wellington who were expected to win.

I think I have been accepted here because not only did I get a goodnight kiss from Harriette but Alice loaned me her most prized possession, her ludicrously expensive Waikato rugby top (in the colours of the German flag if you are interested)

We picked up Eric's neighbour Ian (ex professional polo player) & his son Daniel. After a stop to pick up Ian's brother David where I was treated like a long lost friend we headed off to the game. Ian's wife Carol asked how long I had known the Tanners.

'Erm, 2 days now' I replied.

When we explained that I was a friend of a friend she just laughed & asked the question all Brits over here do

'Will you go back?'

I had been forewarned about Waikato's most vocal fan. he is called 'Possum' & he watches the game from a cherry-picker parked outside the stadium. His encouragement for the team is displayed by revving his chainsaw in time to the chants.

He shouted for the full 80 minutes & at the end threw sweets to the homeward-bound crowds.

Can you imagine the authorities at Twickers allowing someone to watch the game for free every week & rev their chainsaw throughout the match? Me neither.

I offered to drive on the way home so that Eric could have a drink. What I hadn't anticipated was trying to navigate my way home through a strange town (Hamilton) with 4 drunken back-seat drivers all shouting conflicting directions. Very amusing.

We had a very late night which meant that I didn't get up til 9.30 today. Lovely.

I was in the process of beginning some weeding when it was announced that 'Pepper was in the ditch' Pepper is a cow who has calved recently. Her calf had problems walking & Eric & Michelle have been a lot more involved with them than they would be normally.

Pepper has been bullied by the other cows & was consequently in poor health & very lean. She had either fallen or been pushed into a water-filled ditch & did not have the strength to get out again. Luckily, Eric noticed she was missing when he drove past to go to the dump (no rubbish collection in rural NZ)

10 minutes later saw the 3 of us collected at her side pushing, pulling & straining to get her out. The ditchwater was just deep enough to go over your wellies as Michelle soon found out. Initially, Pepper stood & we thought she would be able to walk out. After one step, however, she sank to her knees again back into the mud & water.

Eric had been supporting Pepper to prevent her from completely lying down & Michelle had been trying to encourage her to her feet. After a while, they swapped & Michelle propped her up & Eric went to the business end. Pepper kept peeing in the ditch but Eric said at least it was keeping his feet warm !

At this point, one of the Tanner's neighbours arrived & so she was despatched to bring the other neighbour John with his tractor (a lovely John Deere since you ask)
He made short work of roping Pepper around the neck & after attaching the rope to a chain pulled her out of the ditch.

It looked quite brutal but was over in less than 10 seconds. Like most Kiwi farmers he had very good knowledge of how much more punishment animals can stand than us suft Poms.
He explained that a live cow could be totally suspended from the neck with no ill-effects as long as it was literally only for a few seconds.

After her ordeal, Pepper accepted some sileage & apart from being shaky, looked surprisingly ok. Losing a cow would be hard for the Tanners anyway, but losing one which is suckling a calf would mean Chilli being hand-reared or put on another cow. All time-consuming stuff which farmers can do without.

I have some good pics of the place & the stock & as soon as I can work out how to get them to Q I hope you will see how lovely it is here.

The countryside here is gorgeous. Much softer than the part of South Island I saw. Without the snow-capped mountains it is not as majestic but the softly undulating green hills here are so gentle on the eye. I stopped that car after my interview yesterday in a spot which Michelle had pointed out to me. As far as I could see were dips & dells, like a softly rumpled duvet & every spare inch of grazing here is devoted to dairy cattle. It occurred to me that if I got the stud job I would be looking at that countryside every day.

I must disappear for now as Michelle is cooking for 10 tonight & is busy in the kitchen so I am going to offer a hand (or at least lick the cake tin)

I had a v funny 3-way conversation with Q & Turbo on Thursday evening.

How can it be that there is no time delay speaking to Turbo but loads when speaking to Q ? Hmmm.

Can I whinge please & say that apart from 1 notable exception there has been a distinct lack of contact from the shores of Blighty these days?

I know Blog dried up during the last 2 weeks but that doesn't mean you lot can't tell me what's going on in your lives you know.

Are you lot just trying to tell me that Trish was right & I am boring?

Don't answer that.

Whinge over.

Time for a cuppa. Something else the Tanners observe with wonderful precision here.

Take care you lot,

Cx

Pls excuse any sp. mistakes, spell-check too fiddly with these ickle keys.

Is it just me or has Naive Z been ace this week?

Sorry no Blog last night, Michelle & I spent 2 hours trying to get e-mail working with Pearl with no luck. Too shattered to Blog by the time we admitted defeat.

V easy day yesterday, did the riverside walk in Hamilton,



Riverside walk from Hamilton Gardens to town centre.


had to instigate International Rescue to find me, it failed but luckily I was found anyway (will elaborate later)

Today I went to Trelawney Stud for an interview at 11am.

Stud Tours

I went in a very relaxed frame of mind not being too keen to work on a stud.

That changed when I saw the setting. Imagine working in the grounds of a stately home.

The driveway to the Stud was at least a mile long & bordered with camellia trees & immaculately manicured lawns. The theme continued all the way around the grounds. I have never seen such an immaculate place to work.

Have to go for now as we are taking the girls to piano practice & dropping into Matamata

Bye for now,

Cx

Good Evening,

Feeling a lot more chilled now I am surrounded by greeeen & no traffic.

Big thank you to Bill who had to get up early this morning to take me to the bus station.

I left Auckland in the pouring rain & after sitting in a traffic jam to get to the bus station can honestly say there is not a single aspect of city lfe I miss.

4 hour bus journey to get here & my first sightings of Matamata which looks pleasantly small & friendly. Looking forward to having a look around tomorrow.



Cedar Lodge

The Tanners were just as friendly as I had remembered & how can you not be impressed with a host who says 'You can't have had lunch - here, have a bacon sarnie' Top drawer.



Si - it !



"Get orf my laaand !"



Chilli

This afternoon I unpacked, spread my things around the lovely little flat which will be home



I live here !


and then we swapped potted life histories as we ate an incredibly tasty curry & quaffed some delicious red wine (Ribena for adults)

My story was tame compared to the Tanners offerings & all I can say is if ever a family deserves good luck then it's these guys. They laugh at calamity & should be offered up as a role model to the type of UK resident who whinges that 'the state owes them a living'

I don't want to speak too soon in case I get asked to leave in disgrace but it is such a refreshing change to speak with people who are 'normal' & whose values & ideals are so appealing.

I have spent so long considering my every statement & looking carefully at people's faces to see if I am offending them (or boring them) that to be able to relax & have a giggle over a good meal has made all the difference.

I also love the way Michelle came straight out & asked me about my personal life & my family in a way that was interested without being intrusive. I can imagine she must be a damn good nurse.

Tomorrow Eric goes to work in the morning & Michelle is taking the girls & I into Hamilton. She has said we will take a nosey at the Trelawney Stud on the way. She has also recommended I look at the Hamilton Gardens (apparently a bit like Kew but smaller & free)



Rhododendron



Orchid

I am keen to look around Hamilton, the little bit of it I have seen when driving through it was tremendously appealing. (not so the out-of-town end, a business park, redolent of the Purley Way) The Waikato river wends through it & it is a proper honest-to-goodness river not a sad, dried-up stony bed. It is very reminiscent of the broad stretches of the Avon.

I have offered to do any work around the place I can help out with so hopefully will get stuck into some jobs in the fresh air.

Hope to take & publish pics to Blog to show you guys around.

I am out of tx credit for now & won't be able to top up until tomorrow so if I don't reply to any good-night texts you'll know why.

Just before I go tonight, I heard today that the guy who bought my Blade had binned it. It seems he lost it on a country road & damaged the right hand side. He needs a new pipe & fairing but it's not a write-off.

If I didn't bore you with the tale at the time, this was the chap who said the Blade had broken down when it ran out of fuel & asked me to feel sorry for him due to his escalating insurance costs.

I was torn 2 ways when I heard. Part of me was glad he had smashed it up as I never thought him a capable enough rider to deserve the bike. But a bigger bit of me felt real physical pain to think that my (it's still mine despite money changing hands of course) baby had been damaged. Strange priorities I know but perhaps I am getting a more balanced outlook as I thought that Bill's youngest William was very easy to like.

Imagine that, Auntie Cruella is mellowing.

And on that bombshell (Alan Partridge fans, take note) I will bid you goodnight & go to my quiet ickle sanctuary.

Night-night,

Cx

ps. How did I almost forget ? The Tanners are Radio 4 fans & have said I can listen to R4 on-line. Wonder if they like ELO or would that be too much to ask. Deep joy.

Hey Guys,

Just a quickie as it's past my bed-time & I have to be up early to catch a bus tomorrow.

Ugh - buses - common people. How I loathe etc (Weeny)



Bills manor


We went to see Bill & Linda's new house today. Massive hacienda-stylee drug baron's nest.
If they invite you say 'yes' just for the tv. Easily the size of your average Odeon.
I made friends with the gorgeous grey long-haired moggie in residence. I am suffering
serious aminal withdrawal symptoms.

After doing SkyTower today to fulfil my obligations as a tourist to Auckland
(well worth it, even on a grey day the view is stunning)



Auckland


Highlight was watching
7 grannies leaning on the glass with just their foreheads goading their friends saying 'Come on chickens'

After that I did a l/t in the station office at Auckland Central Police Station.



Clueless

Honest.

Or to be more accurate, I called in to see Bill in his Group 4 uniform & ended up staying chin-wagging for most of the day, listening to him apologise to the people of Kiwidom for not knowing his way around the crime-reporting system.

At grubtime (4M over here ?) we popped out for pizza & had a bit of fun playing 'follow-the-cop' doing silly traffic manoeuvres. It was one of those 'woah, where am I moments ?' when I was following him around the city & you think to yourself, 'Reality check' Me & Bill, 10,000 miles from home driving around Auckland to get pizza in a police car. Odd.

During our pizza we talked about life, love & all the stuff you normally only talk about when you have had too much vino collapso. That's one of the benefits of having bloke friends who are token chicks I suppose.

I had calls from Mal & Mike separately to tell me that they had got the bulldozer going (bugger - I really wanted to drive it !) & also that one of the old Redwoods nannies had come back on a temporary basis to look after the kids. Mal heard her telling the farrier that Trish was silly to let me go as she wouldn't find another nanny prepared to work so hard. That really cheered me up.

What didn't cheer me up was what Mike told me. He had gone to collect one of his boys from school & saw Genevieve standing outside on her own. He asked her what she was doing & she said 'Waiting for Carol' He had to remind her that I was not there anymore & it turned out that their new nanny, Sally, had forgotten to come & collect her. I felt really upset to think that Gen thought I had forgotten her.

It turns out that Trish has employed 3 people to replace me.

An old nanny to look after the kids.
Another girl to exercise the horses
And another lady to do the cleaning/cooking.

Which kind of underlines what I had been saying all along.

Oh well, on the upside, working on the farm did strange things to my body.

I turned over in bed the other morning to feel something hard underneath me (simmer down at the back) I looked to see what it was & it was my forearm. The last time I had muscles in my forearms was when I did a milk-round in 1990. I have lost 1/2 a stone & I have muscles in places I didn't know I had places.

I won't be the new Vin Diesel but it's the best I have felt in a long time. During this 3 days at the Lawrences I have felt lazy, unhealthy & downright fat so I am hoping the Tanners have got some large amounts of physical labour lined up for me.

On the job-front, Geoff e-mailed me today to say the Stud want to meet me (there's a sentence I don't type very often) & I need to arrange an interview this Thursday or Friday. I wasn't overly impressed with the area around Cambridge but he stresses it's a beautiful place to work so I will keep an open mind & go for a look-see.

On another front, Mal has a sheep contact way down in Dunedin in South Island. He thinks she may need a hand with lambing so that's another possibility on a back-boiler.

I am aware of the lack of foties, all I can say is that when I do down-load them, there are some corkers. Hopefully I can get them to the Blog when I get to the Tanners.

Must go for now, have to be up in less than 6 hours.

Night-night,

Cx