Idvinced Kiwi

I didn't get up until 10am this morning. Wonderful.
Even better, it was howling the, by now customary, gale & chucking it down & Kirsty had to get up & go to work.

Don't get me wrong, it could have been anyone, it didn't have to be Kirsty,
it's just that much more enjoyable when you hear someone leaving the house &
you can snuggle down again isn't it ?

Jasmine didn't accompany me to bed last night & was out in the storm.

This was unusual as she is normally in bed before me now, usually washing or kicking teddy, as below




Don't look

However, this morning, Kirsty found her outside, on the way to work & let her in. Soon, there was a cold,
bedraggled Jasmine on the bed, demanding entry to the inner sanctum 'underneath'. Needless to say, I acquiesced.


Claire has gone off for her surfing lesson at Mt. Maunganui, which she booked yesterday.

She looked surprised & not entirely thrilled when the surf-school rang to confirm her lesson was still taking
place. We both thought it would be cancelled due to he violent gales. Silly of us really, this is NZ after all.

She was planning on a relaxing morning with breakfast at Fran's a lovely cafe in Cambridge one minute, & rushing
around grabbing clothing, declaring herself 'scared s***less' the next.



Claire with Hadleigh. Cheeky beggar

I asked her if she was scared of drowning or looking an a*** ?

She considered for a moment, replied 'Both' & left.

I thought that as it's raining & now that you are all comfortable with 'Basic Kiwi'
we would move onto 'Idvinced Kiwi'.

This may be too difficult for some of you, especially if you haven't kept up with your coursework
so, however embarrassing, you must ask for help if you need it.

If you do not, all kinds of misunderstandings may arise from basic everyday interactions with Kiwis.



We'll start with gender.

It's not hard here. In France you have male & female objects, window is female & pen is male (if I remember correctly ?)

In Germany it's a little trickier with male, female & neuter objects.

Here it's easy, everything is female.

I don't just mean all the usual things you would anticipate being female such as ships, airplanes, bikes, cars & the like.

Here, most things in conversation are 'she'

For example ...

'She's a windy day'
'She's a beautiful sunrise/sunset'
'She's a close-run election'
'She's an ugly/useless,unpopular (delete as appropriate) Prime Minister.

The last one is a plant, & to those of you unfamiliar with Helen Clark, won't mean much, but you get my drift.




Next, affirmation.

Kiwis love to let you know you're on the right track. They are warm, friendly people who let you know your
conversational input is appreciated. To do this, they say the following

'Yip yip yip yip yip, yip, yip.

They say it a lot, whilst you are speaking. It's the equivalent to other people saying 'Mmm-hmm' & 'ok'.

At first, you will stop speaking, assuming they want to say something else, or are in touch somewhere
with a pack of far-off dogs. This is a mistake. Just take it for approval & carry on.



Negatives

Things become more difficult here, so pay attention.

When clarifying something, Kiwis often use the negative & the affirmative. In the same sentence.

ie.

Pom - 'Do you agree that the All Blacks were played off the park by the Aussies in that World Cup game ?'
Kiwi - 'Yeah..No, We were shocking alright'

Alternatively, they may choose to answer the same question with the same words, in a different order.
ie

Kiwi - No..Yeah, We were shocking alright.

You will note, the content of the reply is the same, ie, they played badly.

What you have to watch out for, is the order of the words.

The following is our educated guess, nothing more, it may well be incorrect & I can only rely on Darsha to
steer me right if it is.

When I say 'our' this is the collective experience of the Poms over here (The Tanners, The Stokes' Stin, Bill et al,
this is our collective theory, so if it's wrong, blame them.

Whichever word comes first is the one they really mean. The second word is a filler,
a kind of 'ummm' when padding out a sentence.

For example ...

'Did you see how close that horse came to killing me in that stable ?'

may elicit the response 'Yeah..No, she was a close thing, that's for sure' which means 'yes'

or

'No-Yeah, can you go in there again & take it's rug off now ?' which means 'no.'


I hope that's a little clearer ?

If you ask someone to do something for you & they are agreeable, they may respond with
any or all of the following

'Sweet', 'Good as gold', 'Yip yip yip yip'.

I am trying to get them to say,

''andsome', 'sorted', 'bosh', 'done', which is easier than you may think, as they love Jamie Oliver.



Strong affirmations

This is when someone believes very strongly in the point which has just been made.
I understand from Koi-Lee, that this is as popular across the Tasman, in Oz, as it is here.

Pom - 'Are you a good tractor driver Murray ?'
Murray - F****** oath !'

Murray means yes, he is. Emphatically.

I will end today's lesson here, as it's best that you master this before we move on (& because I want to drink the
tea which Kirsty has just made)

Bill, the l/l will be free in 2 mins, it would be great to hear about your week.

I'll leave you with a couple more pics, courtesy of Stan.

One of my favourite Xmas pressies from Mummeh.



Xmas neddies



& also,



Look, in that truck. Aren't they .. ?

Yes, they're goats, quite normal to see this kind of thing when you pull up behind a vehicle.

I love this country.


Bye for now, hope to send more catch-up e-mails today,

Take care you lot, miss you,

Cx

ps. Stin - My counter is broked. :( Do you have the technology ... ?