Up at 7 today for an easy child-free day (almost)
Spent the day in the classroom being instructed about trucks. Being a weird chick I found it fascinating.
Now I know what HGV drivers have to know, especially the self-employed ones, my respect for them has rocketed & it was pretty high before.
Turns out I have to do the theory test Monday & my assessed drive at 0930 Tuesday morning.
I learned loads today about maximum loads, how to restrain them & how to fill in a driver's log book
Not a V23 here but a record of your work hours.
Our teacher today was Grant Ingersoll ( I promise, I don't make these names up.)
He was 6'06", dark buzz-cut with greying temples, excellent Tom Selleck 'tash (I know, I know) chest like a barrel, hands like shovels, 21 years in the air-force, very, very nice & you've guessed girls - married.
Oh well still eye candy.
When I arrived at the testing station I was looking at the other people there & thinking it was obvious they were all outdoorsy workers cos they all had the same brown complexions. When I went to the ladies for the 1st time & looked in the mirror I realised I did too !
The mirror in my bathroom is too small to see anything so I havent seen myself since arriving.
Unfortunately, I don't look so much sun-kissed goddess as Eddie Grundy.
Speaking of which, Alan Titchmarsh is to be the celebrity judge in the upcoming garden competition in the Archers - double whammy - how exciting.
Anyway, I digress.
The day was incredibly interesting & all the way thru Grant kept referring to the police or the 'God Squad' as the truckers call them & telling everyone the best way of how to deal with them. At the end of the day, what does he ask me in front of the whole class ?
You're ahead of me aren't you ?
I told him I would rather not answer but when pressed I told him I was a slurry-shoveller from Slough. Think I got away with it too.
An interesting fact about a place with so few inhabitants is that every1 knows every1 else, as I found out today.
We were told that if we were driving we were only allowed to be 'on duty' for a maximum of 14 hours in any 24.
I asked how that works when we go to shows on a w/e & I am 'on-duty' for 48 ?
Whilst replying he said 'Anyway, the kids won't be hard work will they, not like the horses ?'
I replied 'You haven't met the kids & there are 6 of them'
One of my classmates piped up "If you live in Seddon, that must be The Redwoods?'
'I'll get my coat.'
It's interesting & amusing to note that rivalry is alive & well in NZ today.
Whilst reading out the class rules about how we all had to respect each others rights & yahdeyah Grant said
'Are there any Australians here today ?'
'No ? - in that case any North Islanders ?'
'No - in that case, we will have to pick on you Carol'
"Fair enough' said I. (thinking to myself, let's talk about rugby - shall we ?)
Forgot to tell you of my funniest conversation to date with Mel, Trish's dad.
He follows me whils I work & thinks I am a terriffic, captive audience.
After I had finished lungeing one of the ponies yesterday he said "What are you going to do now you have finished fiddling with that one?' When I had stopped smiling at that he started to tel me about the Maoris & how they have just been awarded compensation by the Kiwi govt for all the oil which has recently been used on land which used to belong to them.
I asked Mel if there was any animosity towards the Maoris from the Kiwis. I am keen to learn about the history of the area & hoped for an insight from this wise, old, local. 'You betcha' was his reply. "Why is that ? ' I asked, suspecting the reply was going to be along the lines of a dispute over land.
"Cos they're a thieving bunch of lying bastards'
Touche.
Q, well done for the piccie of Blenheim although I was hoping you lot would be able to see the hills closer.
Don't know about anyone else but I think the Pastis cartoon-strip is getting a little repetitive with this latest theme. ( ED - Yep )
Shall we start a petition for the return of 'Naive Zebra' & his advice column ?
Still think I will have 'Tell dem how you feeeeel' as my epitaph.
A word about the weather. Bugger.
No seriously, since I have arrived, it has been incredibly mild & I have spent all day outside in just a t-shirt
(well jods as well but I take it that's a given ?) It has also rained at some point every day.
The locals are paying homage & calling me a Rain God as it has not rained properly here in over 2 years. Great.
Today was absolutely awful. Just like a wet November London day. Freezing cold & p****** down all day.
The locals are ecstatic whilst I am piling on the fleeces (The Warehouse $17.99 each)
Q - you made me laugh out loud with "Everyone gets a bargain' When I told 1 of the guys on my course
today about 'Pants in a bag' his reply was 'Everyone gets a bargain'. Superb.
I made another friend today. Emma, on my course gave me her tel no at the end of the day,
told me she lived in Havelock, (haven't looked on the map but it must be nearby) said she had
neddies & did I want to go riding with her on my days off ?
New Zealand is like that.
Speaking of days off, I have 1 2moro. Deep joy. Haven't actually planned anything yet. Will probably ride Jess am & go off & see some sights pm. Just not havng to think about anyone else will be blissful. Note to self, ALWAYS use contraception.
Had a very interesting motoring experience today.
The family needed the Hi-Ace to lug the kids off to hockey so I was invited
to take the Holden. Holden is the Kiwi equivalent of Vauxhall in the UK.
It looks like most cars here, a bit tatty but functional. Kind of an elongated estate car.
I got in it & set off in high winds & lashings of rain at 0730 to make an 0815 deadline this morning.
Blenheim is a relaxed 30 mins away & I had to find the test centre & park so I didn't want to be late.
Suffice to say I decided to give it a bit of rhino (copyright approved)
The back end decided it would like to be on 1st name terms with the front end & after that initial scare
I feathered the throttle the rest of the way there. Imagine the power of a Porsche with all the
handling finesse of The Herald of Free Enterprise & you're coming close.
Couple that with winding, narrow roads & drops of 500 feet with only a single strand of wire between you
& soiled pants & you have a driving experience to sharpen your concentration.
When I got back home in 1 piece I asked Chris what engine size the Holden was ?
3.8 litres. Hmmmmm.
Henry would love these roads, I have seen a few of his ancestors here.
In my days off I hope to master the enigma that is camera plus computer & entertain my readers with piccies.
Have just spoken to Stu. It seems he is sending out an aid parcel complete with Yorkshire tea-bags.
Stu, have been thinking about my Mum & was thinking it would be nice if she could read Blog.
Only draw-back is she is not on pooter.
Was wondering if you would mind periodically printing off Blog & posting her chunks ?
Don't know if you want to liaise (2 i's) with Q & see if there is a fool-proof way of printing it in an orderly,
reader-friendly fashion ? Can I leave it to the 2 of you ? ( Ed - Stu drop me a line please with wellphone number )
If it's poss her h\a is 17,Drovers Walk, Hellifield, Skipton, N.Yorks BD23 4DW. MRS JE GEORGE. Obliged.
On that same note Q, tried looking in 'general' under 'properties' for history, still no joy
There OS is Windows '85 to 2001 does that help ?
Also, no Blog today ?
V.poor.
How am I supposed to keep up with tales of Lovely Col, JFP, Sqwark & the VS mafia ?
How is Ken getting on. Has he stolen your love yet with bits of tuna ?
Do you make him fresh fruit salad for brekkie on e/t & if so, does he leave the grapefruit ?
V. impressed to hear you have kicked the weed. Big supportive hug.
Hope you lot don't mind if I reply to your mails on here ?
It just saves time.
I will try not to embarrass you with lurid revelations.
Lolly - thanks for the foties. He looks like a human coconut shy. Almost as entertaining as you doing air-guitar
in just your tiger-print mini-knicks with a floor-mop. Oooops - did I type that out loud ?
On a final note, charger has arrived & fone is working now so will be a bit more contactable. ( Ed - Note to all people trying to phone , only call her on her mobile if it is mega mega urgent , as Cx will be having to pay the bill as it's still on UK network )
Right, off to bed with Bill (Bryson) thought I had better clarify.
Happy Friday you guys.
Cx
ps Thanks again Stu, much appreciated, wasn't free to speak when you rang.
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